Kimberly K.
Yelp
"I think it is called Will Lane." - one of the three extremely beautiful women working at Berdoll Pecan Farms on Highway 71.
"Will?" - me, with rapt curiosity, completely distracted by her beauty.
"I think it is CALLED Will Lane." - Berdoll woman, kindly trying to point me in the right direction of Little Thailand for lunch.
"It is called... Will... Lane?" - me, feeling like I am learning a new language in a foreign country and saying the same word over and over and over and not getting it right.
"No, CALLED Will Lane." - her, beginning to raise her voice.
"Oh, so it is called Will Lane." me, while thinking, "who the fuck is on first" and, "do NOT start yelling at me about the name of a street, it is NOT that big of a deal" and, "Merde, our first fight."
"Yes, CALLED WILL. LANE. That is it." --her, looking at me like I am a Martian who has just landed here, guided by her overly high and bright red, blinking neon sign that speaks my real language, "CHOCOLATE...COVERED...PECANS", but that is all the English that I know. I am a Martian for god's sake, come here to eat chocolate covered pecans and drive you crazy while I am still learning your fucking language. Actually, sit down here before I zap you with my gun, you WILL teach me your language!
"Oh, Caldwell Lane?" -me, laughing.
"Yes, and I think it's pretty easy to miss." -her.