Joshua S.
Yelp
Wow. This was some great stuff. Not entirely sure where to start. Ok. Deep breath. Let's go.
I was in Kingston, Ontario. It's a quaint little town. Reminds me of Boston mixed with Gainesville. It was last Friday night, and pay day at that, so I decided to treat myself.
Le Chien Noir means "The Black Dog". I found this out halfway through my meal. I don't know why I liked that so much. The name of a place literally doesn't matter and does nothing to change my opinion of the food. It could be called The Dog's Fart and it would still taste the same. Actually I'd probably go to any place that had "fart" in its name, because that's always going to be funny. But whatever, I liked "The Black Dog".
It was a pretty busy night. The only open seat was at the bar. It's a good thing I'm always alone and like to get my drinks fast. The bartender's name was Josh. But of course I knew that already from the bi-annual Josh meetings. I may have said too much.
I ordered a Sazerac from the bartender whom I did not know at all. I noticed he didn't use Peychaud's bitters, but I also think it might be more difficult to get in Canada, so I guess I can give a pass on that one. Still tasted good, albeit on the sweeter side.
It took me a while to order anything. There was a lot that I wanted. Namely all of it. Especially the oyster selection. Hell, I could have just gotten 6 of each kind of oyster and still spent a pretty penny (Do they have pennies in Canada? I bet they have 1 cent and 2 cent pieces. Canada's weird.). I settled on some Irish Point oysters, as I'd never had them before, and you can't go wrong with PEI oysters really. Delicious on their own, but in the accouterments that came with, there was this house-made jalapeno and granny smith apple puree. Now I generally like just a squeeze of lemon and a little horseradish or something, but this stuff was something else. So...do that. Get some oysters. Eat that stuff.
At this point I'd like to give a shout out to my main man Michael who was sitting next to me at the bar. He owns a cool nerdy/game store around the corner from El Chien Noir. I visited there probably 3 separate times. He and I started chatting, first about the food, then about nerdy stuff we like. And I still think the new Star Wars movies will be just fine! (Check out Michael's shop Minotaur. Very cool place. I got chlamydia there. By that I mean this http://www.giantmicrobes.com/us/products/chlamydia.html )
But Michael recommended the "Grilled Pacific Octopus" appetizer. Menu says it comes with, "charred jalapeno, mint & cannellini bean salad, smoked paprika-orange vinaigrette". And that was a real treat. I will say this about it, however. It's difficult to eat. The pieces of octopus are a little large, and octopus is difficult to cut, especially with just a butter knife. So just stick that chewy bitch in your mouth and get to chomping. That was a fun sentence to type.
Now there must be something said about the real MVP of the night. The beautiful waitress with the cleavage and the perfect dress to show it in. We did not speak one word to each other. Thank you for everything.
I couldn't decide on what to get for my main course. Josh recommended one of the most expensive things on the menu, like I would expect any good Josh to do in his position. Michael said go for the Wild BC Halibut because it's difficult to get good fish in Kingston. But I settled on the 'Willow Grove' Pork Rib Chop. It was a huge piece of meat. Beautifully done. And the rhubarb-ginger chutney on top really set the whole thing off. I would eat this every day of the week if I could.
I debated desert because the special that night was a Bleu Cheesecake which seemed really interesting to me. But then I remembered I don't like cheesecake. I don't know what it is. It's one of those things I'll try every 6 months or so just to see if I still don't like it. All these years, still not interested. Oh well, I was stuffed anyway. So I ordered a glass of port. I still don't understand port, by the way. It's an interesting enough flavor, but I don't understand the point of it. And why does it come in what is basically a thimble? I think I'll look it up on Wikipedia after this. Seems like the best use of my time.
So in the end, I spent a small Canadian fortune, which isn't that bad because that's only like $16 US anyway, so who gives a damn, right? Plus I got a great experience out of it. And if the cleavage girl ends up reading this, call me!