Scott R.
Yelp
I have no idea if you can even go there now due to Hurricane Ian. This review was originally posted in July of this year, but Yelp HQ took my last review down even though I violated NONE of their inappropriate content guidelines. I cleaned it up a skosh - let's see if this one sticks.
If I had to describe this restaurant to someone, I would call it "a hot, sweaty, chaotic event in a fire-trap building with good food, nice servers ('Bubble Scouts') and a not-so-nice hostess." The previous time I was in the area was 2002 for my sister's wedding. The night of the bachelor party, the ladies went to the Bubble Room. I've never been one for strip clubs, so I dipped early, went to the Bubble Room, and loved it. A generation later, it's still there, just more crowded. If you have a reservation, make sure you leave out the members of your party that show up late, because they will threaten to give your table away no matter the situation. My wife had been planning my 50th birthday party there. Over a 3-month period, she had 6 separate conversations to plan for a 5pm dinner on July 6. When we got there, the hostess said they don't seat partial parties, and if everyone wasn't there by 5:10pm, they were giving away our tables. Let me get this straight - this birthday party my wife had been planning for months, you were going to muck it all up if one person came in after 5:10? I had heard restaurants say things like that before, but never have I seen a restaurant nearly ruin a milestone birthday that was planned for 3+ months over some bulls__t 10-minute rule that was compounded by their own nightmarish parking situation. The last thing I needed on my vacation for my 50th birthday was this kind of anxiety. It was pretty intolerable that we had to promise to order for everyone who wasn't there in order to keep our table. Better than having our table given away, but it was still quite infuriating. Anyway, 5 people in our party cancelled the day before due to COVID, so we no longer had our own room. We were herded into that room at the top of the first flight of stairs just to the right and forced to sit in 2 separate tables (yay!) which I can't really blame them for. We went from 20 guests to 15, so I see why we couldn't have our own room. That said, can you say FIRE HAZARD? It was hot, sweaty, and wall-to-wall people and all I could think of was, "If there's a fire up in this bitch, we're screwed!" I couldn't even go to the bathroom without being in intimate physical proximity to a minimum of 20 strangers. I do. not. like. crowded. places.
In terms of the food, we enjoyed everything we ate. Bubble bread and sticky buns are delicious and unique. For preprandial libations, I had both the Captiva Cooler and the "If You Like Piña Coladas." While the former was okay, the scene stealer was that piña colada, serviced in a cored pineapple and delicious. For dinner, I had Charlie Chaplin's Chops, each with a different one of their signature sauces. I love fruity things, so I expected to like the bourbon mango sauce better, but no, the winner was the mushroom merlot sauce and it wasn't even close. My son raved about his "Marilyn's Mignon" cooked perfectly medium. The birthday cake was their coconut cake - it was just okay. I know the Orange Crunch is the cake to get, but I detest cream cheese icing. However, my wife picked some up to go the next day and if you eat the icing in a thinly layered small quantity it's actually quite delightful and you barely notice it's cream cheese icing (take a heaping mouthful of the stuff, however, and it will be painfully or delightfully obvious, depending upon your tastes.)
Overall the food was good, it was the rest of the experience that wasn't up to snuff. If I had to do it over again, I would NOT have a 50th birthday party there, I would save that for Doc Fords down the road. If you want to have a 5-star experience there, I offer the following advice:
1) Leave your car at the resort. There is a snail cart that goes up and down Captiva Drive and will take you from your resort anywhere on Captiva you wanna go. Not sure if it goes to Sanibel, but find somewhere on Captiva to put your car and then take the snail cart. Parking is an absolute clusterf#$k at the Bubble Room even with two separate lots, both of which they own.
2) If you have a reservation, get there early.
3) Plan to eat early. The later you go, the longer the wait, the worse the parking, the more acrid the air, the sweatier the clientele, the more people hanging around the bar, the more crowded the premises, and therefore, the bigger the fire hazard.
4) Be nice to the Bubble Scouts and tip them well. We only had to experience the chaos in one evening - they have to work in it.
5) Take in the decor, and take lots of pictures. It is a unique experience which I would have rated more highly if not for the issues with the milestone birthday that they nearly ruined.