HOTEL NO

The coolest stay ever! I stayed here for a night with my 9 year old son, we had the air stream with the spa, absolutely worth it. There is so much thought that goes into the entire experience, the mini bar, roof top games, free morning coffee from the incredible cafe downstairs. I’m not used to city noise/street lights coming through curtains etc, so it was a bit loud and bright at night, but figured that’s just all part of the experience and would definitely stay there again! We loved it so much. I got tonnes of cool mum points for picking this place 😎

Place was rad. Comms were real good leading up to the booking. Made it super easy for us. Was a cool experience finding the place too. The Airstream was sick! Heaps more room than I imagined. Bed was comfy, shower was legit too. If you're looking for spot to stay in Melbourne and you're over the standard hotel experience, I highly recommend Hotel No.

My wife and I spent a night in this hotel few nights ago and the whole experience was absolutely memorable. The party lights in the spa are amazing. Free wine beers and some delicious snacks + unlimited ☕️ down the cafe, what else do you need??. I will recommend this to somene that is looking for adventure and something different to stay in Melbourne. We are looking at bringing kids here next time! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Seriously an amazing place Loved the airstream Location & parking was awesome The most comfy bed I've ever slept in , the sheets are like silk!!! The only disappointment was that I emailed Hotel No and told them it was my young son's birthday and the stay was for him with no acknowledgement at all. The mini bar while super generous didn't even have a drink for a child which my son felt upset & disappointed about, especially watching me drink mine 🤣 We've stayed in hotels previously and when mentioned it was my son's birthday we've had a upgrade, a beautiful hand written note from the staff and lolly bags etc... Just a small acknowledgement like a birthday welcome and maybe a soft drink would have made it that little bit more personal and special. Little touches go a long way Other than this are stay was wonderful

If you’ve historically walked past these snazzy airstreams and you’re now trawling through the reviews to decide if you should book a stay: let this be your sign YES, YOU ABSOLUTELY SHOULD STAY HERE! We come to Melbourne a couple of times a year to watch footy and get our fix of quirky culture but as this trip happened to fall on a Birthday I was looking for a way to make it a little extra special and the Airstream with benefits was the perfect way. Amazing location, amazingly quirky, amazing atmosphere, and soaking in a hot tub with a belly full of amazing cheese whilst overlooking the city surrounds...yep, amazing. So many amazing little touches like being able to print out a couple of happy snaps on the sprocket printer, being able to enjoy so many delicious little treats from the minibar, being able to take a real cup just downstairs to enjoy a real coffee, being able to jump into a ridiculously comfy bed and watch an iPad on the ceiling… the thought that has gone into creating the perfect space and experience is unmatched. Already excited about coming up with an excuse to stay here again ASAP!

Positives: Good location, unusual/quirky accommodation, comfortable bed, hot tub upgrade available, free, average tasting (for Melbourne) coffee from the nice guys at the cafe downstairs except on weekends when they are closed. Negatives: The airstream (#6) we stayed in was incredibly cold, the heater barely worked and all the windows have to be left open a crack for ventilation, even still there was black (mold?) on the window sill and the towels never dried (they did replace them every morning because of that but still), everything felt cold and damp. Our friends in #5 had the same experience. We asked for extra blankets and were given 1 thin one each, the kind you might use to protect the back seat of your car if you your dog normally sleeps there. The towels were so old and faded looking , they looked like they belonged to your grandmother and had been bleached a million times (maybe on purpose as part of the vibe?) , I know they were clean but they looked dirty. The cheap pink plastic door to the bathroom didn't close properly so the steam from the shower kept setting the fire alarm off. We moved to #4 , warmer but the plastic brackets holding the shampoo and conditioner to the wall in the bathroom fell down in the middle of the night. But the worst was their digital key. You use your phone to access the building (via metal stairs with a funk of unknown origin) and your room. Sounds simple enough, download the app, open the doors, find your airstream etc. Except we arrived at 10 pm, and went straight to the hot tub, no place to put my phone so I leave it on the bed, the door closes and unfortunately automatically locks behind me. So we are stuck in 10 degree C winter weather in our wet bathing suits with no phone. We borrow one and after a series of tries find the emergency after hours number except we get a recording, when you select "left phone in room" the automated voice calls you an idiot. Not funny. We have to leave a message since no one is answering the emergency number. We try again and again and again until someone finally answers. He sounds like he has been asleep. Tells us there is a spare key. We get back in but unfortunately since the airstream is freezing it is hard to warm up. Two nights later my husband doesn't realize my phone is in the room charging and it happens again. Luckily we remember the code in case no one answers the emergency number again. The last night we switch rooms. They leave a key for us but don't tell me my phone will no longer work to get into the building so we have to coordinate with friends to let us in the building. My sense is that this happens frequently. If you are going to have this kind of system at least be available. We also had a question on a Saturday but no one answers the regular line on the weekend I guess. I tried to leave a message but the mailbox was full. What kind of business are they running? The "free" minibar had really awful cheap wine (I am making a point about it because in Australia it is easy to get really good wine for not too much money) but we drank it anyway because what a nightmare that place was. oh and one last thing, the pink astroturf around the airstreams was wet and mushy and dirty looking from the rain, it reminded me of the weird trend in the 70s of people putting carpet in their bathrooms, it had that feel. I wouldn't complain so much if it wasn't freaking expensive. I mean it felt like camping in the rain but paying to stay at a high end hotel.

We really enjoyed the experience after we got past the cryptic entry instructions. The staff (Cara) were extremely helpful and we really loved being able to print some photos of our getaway on the HPsprocket. Location was very central to all the great Melbourne attractions and the coffee from the cafe downstairs was a great way to start the day The van had a very comfy bed and a nice little ensuite. Was a great place to stay.

Wonderful stay at this beautiful Airstream! Getting to the accommodation was fun and unique and there was a rooftop activities area with jenga and cornhole complete with beanbags and fairy lights. The bed inside the airstream was very comfortable and the iPad supplied was easy to use. Would definitely recommend this to friends and family!