Alexandra M.
Yelp
Saw this place the last time I was in NY. Basically another garbage dump whose owner believes that plopping tomato sauce and processed cheddar cheese and cow (as opposed to buffalo) mozzarella on a slab of dough and heating it in a cold oven for a few min. counts as "pizza."
Not necessary to enter the place to gauge the quality of their signature product--only only has to look at the pics of it on these Yelp reviews (or on Google--see below)--completely identical to the stale offerings in the plastic casings at various gas stations.
Technically, even that's unnecessary--the silly maga flag outside is a clear indication that the owner couldn't hack it in the city of pizza w/his product alone and needed to resort to marketing to the segment of society that's too dumb to try anything other than Domino's and McD's, so to THEM, it's (obviously) fine dining. Can't blame him, though, it WORKS.
Should be a hint to any of you out there with zero culinary skills and a lump of cash--start your own junk joint :) Get the cheapest frozen dough, processed cheese, and tomato sauce in bulk, make multiple slabs beforehand, and freeze it. Then, when open for business, hire undocumented labor* to run the frozen slabs fast though a conveyor belt oven.
Finally--for the most important part--put a trump flag outside and mark up the price 10x. Or better yet, screw the flag and just call it "Trump Pizza"--within seconds your business will be flooded w/rowdy, brainless idiots who think your stuff is the best in the country** *** simply because of it's association with their orange Messiah.
Much easier to do this in Mississippi or Alabama, not NYC, where one has the burden of competing w/real pizzerias. Amazing the owner has yet to figure this out.
* - Do not allow patrons to see the workers
** - Offer chocolate, pineapple, sausage, pepperoni, and extra (processed) cheese as toppings on one of the pizzas and call it the "Trump Deluxe"
*** - Do not allow Gordon Ramsay or any actual chef into the kitchen to sample (or look at) the food