Kathryn B.
Yelp
Sadly, tonight is my last of 8 nights at the Polynesian Beach Club. I have enjoyed my stay here and would recommend it to anyone. I made some friends and talked to some ubercool people.
Initially, after booking airfare to Hawaii, I went through Expedia to find a hoTel...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Then after realizing how irresponsible it would be to cash out my 401(k) for a vacation, I had the epiphany to look into hoStels. I read reviews and went with the Polynesian because it was the only hostel that had no reviews by someone who contracted Bed Bugs. And it just so happened to be one of the cheapest.
I was checked in by Daniel, very friendly and professional. I got the semi-private room for $65 that had a full sized bed with a shared bathroom. There were sheets on the bed but luckily, I'd read a suggestion in another Yelp review to bring a blanket as they do not provide them and I was glad I did.
I went on several excursions that the Polynesian runs and I encourage doing the same as they are a great bargain and fun experience. Tuesday morning I took the hike to Diamond Head with Joe as the tour guide. He is a kind, thoughtful person and offered up a bunch of tidbit information throughout the hike, plus some helpful advice. Wednesday I took the North Shore tour with Jess as the guide. He is a fun cool laid back person who made the tour fun for the whole group. They also offer tours to Kailua (I went there on my own and it was nice) and scuba diving excursions. They've stopped doing Pearl Harbor even though I think their website still shows that they do.
They have dinners a few times a week that you sign up for. During my week I had the Chicken Alfredo Pasta ($5), Roasted Pig/Pork w/ Rice ($7), and Spagetti Pesto ($5). These are great because they're cheap, tasty and convenient, plus they come with cake! Kevin who cooked is great and so is the friendly older guy who acted as his maître d.
Jen and Daniel who both work there do massages for $25/ 30 minutes. I got one with Jen and it was nice after a long hike.
I was pretty stoked about the Free Pancake breakfast I'd seen advertised. It's served from 8:30-10:00 am......and I do mean IT, and PancakE breakfast, as in singular not plural. I was surprised my first morning when I learned that you get ONE pancake at a time. You can get back to the end of the line after you finish your one pancake, or if you go at 9:15 instead of 8:30 you may luck out and be able to take more than one, if there's nobody behind you in line. They also offer coffee and tea in the office.
When I'd read the Yelp reviews on the Polynesian, the most common complaints are about those pancakes (being "monotonous"), the cleanliness of the hostel, and the noise. Well just to address those points, nobody's forcing the pancakE down anyone's throat, it's a complimentary amenity they offer. Yeah, it's not as clean as, say, The Waldorf Astoria, but it's a HOSTEL. It should be a prerequisite that anyone who wants to review a hostel must first be able to DEFINE hostel. It's cheap, basic, communal accomodations that's half a step above camping, it shouldn't be compared to a five star hotel. As far as the noise, yeah it's pretty noisy at night. Luckily my old apartment (in FS NY) was above a bar and an Irish tap dancing school, so I'm quite used to noise and it doesn't bother me.
If you do decide to book at Polynesian, here's some suggestions:
1. Take a blanket and (2) thin towels-one for shower, one for beach
2. Go to the Safeway and buy some groceries-fruit, yogurt, whatever you like to
eat with your pancakE.
3. Sign up for the tours and dinners and talk to people!
4. Rent a moped from Paradise on Wheels on Kuhio, NOT the place next door!
It's $19.95/3 hours, $29.95/8 hours $34/24 hours-head east on 72 ;)
5. Wear flipflops around your room/the hostel because it's impossible to get rid
of every grain of sand when it's a block away from the beach even though
they do clean.
6. You will certainly be stopping at the ABC store at some point. They're on
every corner. Save your receipts because if you spend $100 combined, you
get a prize like a mug or something.
7. Be prepared to witness the homeless epidemic. They are everywhere.
I heard multiple people from the hostel saying "If I had to be homeless, at
least it's in Hawaii", well these homeless are often addicts, and too zonked
out to even know what planet they're on, let alone they're in beautiful
Hawaii. I usually played Santa Claus to them and gave them multiple
cigarettes or cookies or whatever, because what other pleasure do they
have in life. Try to be kind to them or at least don't be disgusted.
In summary, the Polynesian has friendly and helpful staff, many extras to offer, very low rates, incredible location, and No reason NOT to stay here.