Christine C.
Google
The Talland Hotel is sited in an excellent position with views over the sea. Its best asset is its staff, who were both friendly and professional. However, having spent four days at the Hotel, we were disappointed that its did not measure-up to its mainly good reviews and could not be regarded as a luxury hotel (a phase used on-line and in the hotel literature).
We were astounded to find that the premises were themed as ‘Alice in Wonderland’ and more akin to a poor attempt at a venue for a child’s birthday party: Wood panelling painted silver, painted black manikin with lampshade head, silver wall panel of a woman’s rear, banisters painted multiple colours, black and white chequered walls, pixies, fairies, model of an elderly man and large mock-ups of painted budgerigars in the garden . Etc. As the interior furnishings were mixed in with conventional decorations, the whole atmosphere was of one confusion and could only be described as tacky.
Our room was dated, with distressed furniture, plastic, flowers and palm an off-white duvet, without the relief of a throw, a flimsy piece of net draped over the bedhead tied back with artificial orange leaves. Whilst the bathroom was well appointed, there were no blinds at the two windows.
The breakfast buffet was impressive – we did not eat cooked breakfasts. Dinner did not reflect a two red rosette restaurant and despite its high pricing, dishes were underwhelming in presentation and taste.
A lamb shoulder dish (£32) consisted of a small stack of overworked vegetables with small pieces of stringy lamb within it. Bland in taste, with not a sign of a fresh vegetable. The roasted sea bass (£39.50) was a small piece of fish with a limp skin, topping a similar stack of vegetables to the lamb dish. The roasted crown prince squash (£19.20) was bland, ill thought out and yet again not accompanied any green vegetable. The whole dish could only be described as ‘beige’. I could go on but will say that the best meal I had was the Sunday roast, which was appetising and served with fresh, vibrant vegetables. (Interestingly, this was the only day that the head chef was off duty).
Whilst the hotel has a dog friendly dining area, it was somewhat off-putting to see a guest feeding her dog at her table with hotel cutlery whilst a member of staff looked on smiling – really!!
On leaving the hotel, I paid the bill and gave my feed back to the receptionist who was very professional in the way she received them and wrote the points I raised. The General Manager did ring me and discussed my feedback. He was polite and listened to what I had to say but as a lot of effort had been put into theming the hotel, presumably under his watch, I was not convinced that many if any changes would be made. His comment was revealing when he said the theming was to’ invoke childhood memories’.
This hotel is a lovely building with one of the best coastal positions going. With a proper classical makeover and updating and a refocusing of the food menu this could become a high-end venue commanding the highest of tariffs. In our opinion at £1880 for a four-night break, on half board terms, it overpromises and under delivers.
