Robert D.
Yelp
Since everyone is out at the Yelpesque event having fun and I'm sitting at home bleeding after a particularly brutal visit to the dentist, I figured I might as well write a god damn review for a change.
So, most of you wont like the cockpit. It is a dive bar, it is shaped like an isosceles triangle and it serves beer. I like the isosceles triangle, but try to look past my geometric bias on this one.
It is not a gay bar. It should be though. The cockpit is a pretty awesome name for a gay bar.
Not an indie dive bar either. Sorry, should have said that. I blame the meds. It is an old-time dive bar. Some would say dump, but that would be harsh. It smells of stale beer and has a dog. The dog looks like the owner, which is a trademark of a proper pub and fabulous.
My rat just peed on me...
So anyway, the cockpit used to actually be a cock pit. Like, cockfighting. Crazy man-chickens kicking the shit out of each other. Pretty awesome, yes? No? I'm undecided myself. Even better, it hasn't been decorated since. Win.
I'm not sure why I like it. It is unassuming, non-pretentious. It has test match special on the radio all day. It isn't full of douche-bags. Young douche-bags, that is. You get a few city types I suppose. They can channel douche-baggery now and again. Just with money and cuff-links.
Isn't it weird how douche-bag is having a renaissance in the last year or so? I think it is. FIrefox is uncertain on how to spell it and I must confess that I am too. I went for the hyphen as I was feeling nostalgic. I think it was a good choice.
I hate young douchebags with their shoes and lack of baby-rats running on them as they type.
I like Nurofen with codeine.
There are old men who sit in the same place all the time. It is a bit like a white version of Desmond's. Remember that? I loved Desmond's.
Is that racist? I mean, they are definitely white. The only white guy in Desmond's ended up being on Star Trek Enterprise. That was weird.
The movie Barbershop was based on Desmond's. True Story.
That isn't a true story. I made it up because it seemed feasible.
What? Oh, 4 stars. Obviously.
Isosceles.
There was also a white woman on Desmond's. I forgot about her.