Eric J.
Yelp
Often, Yelp reviews are more about either excessively praising or overly attacking a business based on unknown preferences or emotions. This isn't a cathartic review to express how I was "made to feel" at 5411 Empanadas Houston (5411 EH). It's about my experience from the perspective of a small business owner and a somewhat traveled foodie.
First the food--
I've had empanadas and Argentinean food, but never an Argentinean empanada. I anticipated a spicy, savory snack. Empanadas can be a slam dunk for some cooks, but a change in oven time or temperature can make an average empanada great and a great one terrible. I ordered a Malbec beef empanada and a bacon, dates and a goat cheese empanada, along with one serving each of the chimichurri and red hot sauces.
My first impression upon seeing the empanadas was they were more burned than browned, but no big whoop. "Done" is subjective; I'll eat a steak off the temperature I requested, not complain, and still over tip if the service is good (I'll get to service second).
The Malbec beef one was, well...uninspired. I'm a long-time home chef, so I understand the meat preparation method. But, in my opinion, the beef was a bit too acidic and bland to have been sufficiently seasoned and slow-cooked.
The bacon, dates, and goat cheese one was interesting. Goat cheese has a variety of tastes, but I honestly couldn't pick up any goat cheese note. It also had a slightly acrid aftertaste that just hung in the back of my throat for an hour after eating it.
The sauces? I don't know--they weren't put in the bag (I was miles away from the restaurant when I found out and didn't see the need to return just to get them).
Now, the service--
I entered the restaurant wearing a pink t-shirt which read, "be kind". Besides my protective mask, that, along with being a 5'5", 50-something, slightly-built guy would probably have many to see me as pretty unassuming and potentially easy to deal with. Also, there were customers either in or approaching the restaurant, and foot traffic in the surrounding area was all but nonexistent.
The counterperson came from the kitchen area, and after exchanging greetings (which I gave first), and being asked what I would like, I asked the person's name to address them as who they said they were versus who I thought they were. The counterperson responded by motioning to the menu board and saying, "let's just say my name is 'the menu'".
I get it. This wasn't a meet and greet. But really? Where did that come from?
I moved forward, explaining that my companion was from another country, and although I knew what an empanada was he had never tried one. Perhaps I was being too chatty, but even with their COVID protection mask on I could tell that the counterperson couldn't care less.
I went on to ask for menu recommendations, which were given in detail. After I asked another question, the chef leaned into the service window, rested a forearm on the ledge counter, and gave me a blank "are you gonna get something or what" stare that he kept until I placed my order. After fixing my food, the chef came from the kitchen, handed my order to and stood silently alongside the counterperson, resuming the stare.
The coup de grâce? After I thanked them and as I walked away, I heard the counterperson say in a low tone while following the chef to the kitchen area, "okay, they're gone". Wow.
I'm no Gordon Ramsey, 5411 EH is not a Michelin rated restaurant, and a basic description of the empanada would be it's a stuffed pastry street food. But a good empanada dished up with a smile can make a person miss home or dream of having a better one.
I didn't taste the love nor feel the pride at 5411 EH.
But I will go back.
Why? Because my experience may have been a one-off. No restaurant or staff are always at the top of their game, and unless the place is beyond unbearable or dangerous, I always give a "bad" restaurant the thing that I would want someone to give my business--a reasonable benefit of the doubt and if able, another go.
But next time, I'll go back with others. We'll order one of everything on the menu. We'll compare our experiences. If the consensus is favorable, I'll tell the organizers of a Houston-based conference scheduled to be held this coming December (of which I'm part of the vendor scouting committee) about 5411 EH.
If the consensus isn't favorable, I'll just do as I did the first visit--say thank you and leave.
Except, this time I'll say, "okay, we're gone"...and stay that way.