Christopher C.
Yelp
Bought tickets for my wife and I to see Bob Dylan on 10/21/23 for her birthday. Showtime was 8:00 and Dylan is known to go on promptly. We arrived a little later than we would have liked, but thought we'd still make it to our seats with time to spare (we go to a LOT of concerts). To our amazement, the queue to enter the venue was still backed up out of the front doors and down the street! Upon entering, it became clear why. There was no clear system for the myriad security measures in place and the crowd was completely bottlenecked in the narrow foyer, with the Civic's generally rude and unfriendly staff trying in vain to wand, check tickets, write seat numbers on little sticky-note-like chits, lock cellphones in these mylar pouches, etc. (Dylan has a strict no cell policy).
By the time we made it through this gauntlet, Dylan had already taken the stage and was playing. We walked upstairs to the balcony, where an usher told us which door to use for our section. Upon entering the theater itself, it was pitch black, and we joined yet another large group of people standing inside the door, in the balcony aisle, with no idea whatsoever how to find our seats. No ushers were present inside the theater itself.
In the midst of this chaos, I suddenly became aware that I was POURING sweat. I had on a tee shirt and light jacket. I took the jacket off and was already starting to completely sweat through the tee. It had to have been almost 100 degrees in the balcony section, with no ventilation or air circulation whatsoever.
Meanwhile Dylan is on his third song already and it's dawning on me that we are missing a large chunk of the show which - thanks to Ticketmaster and scalpers buying up every seat in the joint within minutes of going on sale - I paid at least three times more than face value to attend. Finally at my wit's end, I ran back out and down the stairs to where I had previously encountered the only usher thus far. I told her about the mob of lost souls in the dark with no way to locate our seats.
"You're kidding", she said.
"I'm not", I said.
Finally she offered to help, but when we walked back into the show room, she just said, "Oh, but the show's already started. You're gonna have to wait until in between songs to get seated", and then she just walked away!
At that point, my sweet wife had just about had enough and said, "that's it, follow me".
We stumbled up the aisle and found a couple of seats in the sweltering darkness. Thank goodness her vision is better than mine. By some divine providence, no one ever came to claim the seats we settled into - probably because they couldn't find the damn things!
Unlike seemingly the entire staff at the Akron Civic Theatre, Bob Dylan, at 82 years old, definitely showed up to work that day. He played for over two hours, putting on an incredible performance. The theater itself is uniquely ornate and beautiful, though seating is unusually cramped (even for my 6'4" frame).
But the overall experience was absolutely unacceptable, especially given the inflated cost of secondary market ticket prices. I concede I am probably spoiled. I'm from Cleveland, 40 miles north, and we have an entire district of historic theaters that are welcoming, efficient, well-staffed, and climate controlled. As I creeped along through the crowded lobby toward the exit, drenched in perspiration, trying to find someone, anyone who could unlock the mylar pouch to regain access to my phone, I had plenty of time to contemplate if I would ever dare to attend another show at this aesthetically beautiful but woefully unpleasant venue.