INCOGNITO AUDITOR
Google
🍕 Aurelio's Pizza – 1 Star
🚨 Breaking news: I survived eating here, but my dignity didn’t. 😵🍽️
I came in with dreams of cheesy bliss, crispy crust, and flavor explosions. What I got was a crime scene disguised as a pizza. Imagine a soggy cardboard base wearing a ketchup costume, sprinkled with the memory of cheese. 🧀😬
The pepperoni looked tired. Like it had been through something. Witness Protection Program? Emotional breakdown? I don’t know. But I wanted to hug it and whisper, “You’re safe now.” 😔🍕
Service? Well, if sarcasm was on the menu, they were serving extra large. I asked for napkins and got a sigh that could power a wind farm. 💨😑
The ambiance was… fluorescent. Like a DMV decided to try Italian food. 🇮🇹✨ But hey, at least my existential crisis had good lighting.
To sum it up: I came for pizza, left with trust issues. 🙃
Not all heroes wear capes. Some just warn you with 1-star reviews. 🦸♂️📉