Tommy P.
Yelp
I'm one day into a three-night stay and I have never wanted to go home early so bad before. (Edited later: never again.)
Our stay at Crockfords Las Vegas started out bad: I had to kind of wrangle and persuade a bell guy to take our luggage. Normally not the end of the world - I'd just haul it myself, but I've got a torn rotator cuff at the moment and I really didn't feel like handling it myself - and that's why I went to Crockfords, which claims to be a nice hotel.
Okay, the lady checking us in said she would have everything sent right up. No joy. After a half hour, I tried twice to call down - no joy, no answer. So, I scanned the QR code on my ticket, and was told, "That's processing."
I went down to the bell desk, where there were three people standing around joking. Where's my luggage; I need to change for supper. Um . . . after a couple minutes they find it and apologize, "The guy the computer assigned that to went off duty right afterward." Okay, but - WTH? So, bad rotator cuff and all, _I_ wind up schlepping our three bags across the lobby and up to our room. Yay. And ow.
But this is what's untenable and why I'd urge you to think twice. The place is only three years old, and this was the worst bed I've ever had in Vegas. Ever - worse than Palazzo. The mattress was beat-down and gave no support whatsoever on my side and the super-thick mattress cover made it worse. I lay down fine and got up with agonizing back pain. Just totally unacceptable. I wound up having to sleep in the center of the king bed in order to get even a minimal amount of support. This mattress should be retired. I'd call downstairs about it, but after the bell desk debacle, I just don't want to deal with moving - and I don't trust these guys to replace the mattress with a proper one. So, two more nights pressed in the middle of the bed, with unnecessary back pain. (Update - the second and third nights, I just slept on the chaise lounge. My wife's side of the king bed was not worn out, but I really think a decent bed that doesn't _injure_ patrons is a fundamental requirement of any hotel, let alone one that hopes to claim a certain chic status. When mentioned on check-out, they "made a note of it." Thanks!)
But maybe this is why the bedstand has a . . . I don't know what to call it, "massage gun"? I don't know about or even touch such things (and wonder if even looking at it can transmit some HPV detritus from previous guests - how _does_ one sanitize something like this?), but the bedroom bizarrely features a massage gun of some sort, apparently the unholy spawn of a DeWalt power tool (jackhammer?) and some kind of not-PG-rated "marital aid." What the heck? How about put in a decent bed, Crockfords, and you can spare us the vibrating appliances? Sheesh, I don't see a slot for quarters, but this gives what is trying to be a classy hotel a distinct Seventies "magic fingers" vibe. Ugh.
The bathroom is a solid ten degrees Fahrenheit warmer than bedroom, no matter what the temperature setting, and the heat leaches into the bedroom area. Not sure whether it is from a heated floor (doesn't seem to be) or from the weird chandelier that provides light. Decent shower - with room for a five-piece combo for some reason (hopefully unrelated to the vibrating device - no judgment). One of the elevators is out this morning, leaving only _one_ elevator in service. Drape/sheer buttons don't work.
Housekeeping has done a good job (although they don't come until after 4p) and is very nice when you run into them; same with custodial staff. Most employees seem polite and friendly (although some of the Conrad check-in staff appeared to be put out with a request for walking directions to the Strip - and, after _three_ thank-yous by us, were unable to scrounge up a "You're Welcome," or even a "No Worries"). But . . . why does Crockfords feel like it's run by a Soviet committee? Great parts (crappy bed excepted), but it just doesn't come together.
Here are some other good parts: it's quiet, turndown service, just like you'd expect at a nice place (but not on the last night?); shave and dental kits; an in-room Nespresso maker (albeit with downmarket coffee pods); a fridge next to the mini bar; great view; pretty bars, pretty lobby, pretty lounge up top. Easy agreement to late check-out. Coffee, tea, fruit and light pastries in the morning. The (Bluetooth-enabled) makeup mirror is nice, as is the (Bluetooth-enabled) JBL soundbar under the TV.
But the Resorts World food court is a dystopian nightmare of Hello Kitty skeletons and overpriced, oversalted food under weird yellow lighting - ugh.
FYI: Crockfords reservation emails don't explain which lobby one checks in at so, just for you - suites use the main "Crockfords Club" with the gates; the regular rooms at the Conrad "preferred guest" desk amongst hoi polloi next to the taxi stand.