Hillstone

"Shout "Hillstone" in a crowded room, and at least five people will ask what you’re doing for lunch. Such is the effect of this upscale chain, which, depending on the state you’re in, also goes by names like Houston’s, Gulfstream, and R+D Kitchen. Founded in Nashville in 1977, Hillstone Restaurant Group has a single location in NYC, a few blocks from Madison Square Park. It’s a dark, expansive room with a lively bar area and slatted blinds straight out of a film noir, and it’s secretly one of the toughest reservations in the city. Think business casual Applebee’s, if Applebee’s had spotless service, a cult-like following, and the consistency of an atomic clock. photo credit: Hillstone Restaurant Group Every Hillstone enthusiast, from Dallas to Nomad, has their own dish hall of fame, and ours goes something like: grilled artichokes, french dip, and fried chicken sandwich. The burger is also impeccable in a cookie-cutter sort of way (the chain in a nutshell), and the rotisserie chicken salad is tough to pull yourself away from. It has, arguably, too much dressing, but that’s what the people want, and Hillstone knows it. You get the sense that everything here, down to the Jacuzzi-sized booths and goblet-like wine glasses, was meticulously engineered to please. Spotlights cast cocoons of light around every table, so that you feel like you’re in your own little bubble, and the second you sit down, a host asks if you’d like a drink. Order a martini, and a server will swap out your glass halfway through, replacing it with a chilled one. photo credit: Eva Kolenko We aren’t saying you need to sprint to Hillstone. It's still a chain, and, while it’s great at any number of things (including sushi), the place isn't the absolute best at anything. If you’re planning a business meal, it’s great for that. But, most of all, this precisely run restaurant is perfect when want to you sink into an abnormally comfy seat and know exactly how the next two hours are going to play out. As any fan will overzealously explain, that’s the real magic of Hillstone. Food Rundown photo credit: Bryan Kim Hot Towels Of Hillstone's many quirks—no hats in the dining room, no parties larger than four—the free hot towels are the most endearing. As the menu notes, they're available upon request. Grilled California Artichokes No matter which Hillstone you’re at, the menu always specifies that these—apparently very special artichokes from Castroville, Ca.—have limited availability. Is it a gimmick? Who knows. But order the heavily charred artichokes every single time. photo credit: Bryan Kim Spinach & Artichoke Dip The massively popular spinach & artichoke dip is, in fact, just fine. If you want to order it for the table, we aren't going to stop you, but we wish the chips weren't so pale and flimsy. photo credit: Bryan Kim Thai Tuna Roll Hillstone offers about 10 different sushi rolls, which tend to be elaborate, mayo-heavy, and crowd-pleasing. As a rule of thumb, order the ones that sound like they'd be served aboard a Carnival cruise. The Thai tuna roll, for example, with crunchy macadamia nuts and huge shards of avocado. photo credit: Bryan Kim Yellowtail Sashimi Salad You were probably expecting a salad with sashimi mixed in. But that's not how things work here. For some reason, the sashimi comes on the side, so it's almost like you're getting two dishes in one. The thick slices of yellowtail are fantastic, and the salad oozes sesame dressing, in a nice way. photo credit: Eva Kolenko Cheeseburger Everything you’re looking for, no more, no less. The housemade bun is fluffy, and the thick slice of cheddar glistens, half-melted on a thick patty. photo credit: Bryan Kim Knife & Fork Barbecue Ribs The name is deceptive. You do not need a knife to eat these near-perfect ribs, because the meat falls right off the bone. A fork is useful, however, because the sauce is thick and sticky." - Bryan Kim