Jimmy Valentine's Lonely Hearts Club

Great place, great service and inclusive atmosphere. I love the dark/funky vibe and DJ’s were great. I recently went to the goth night party and feel compelled to share my experience. I had just arrived with my wife and went to an open space at the bar. I was surprised when I was shoved from behind by a girl attempting to get to the bar. It was rude, but I let it go. Then the girl said excuse me we’re standing here and I said “I’m aware and I was minding my own business. You just walked up behind me and shoved me out of nowhere?” Now I’m just confused and disheartened trying to process what is even happening. I was completely caught off guard and the interaction just made me feel uncomfortable. The bartender went to take their order and when they didn’t know what they wanted she asked me for my order. I’m a bartender and would have done the exact same thing. At that moment the two women started yelling at the bartender and accused she and I of being homophobic and racist. I don’t know who was more offended between the bartender and myself. The irony is I was there with my gay and queer friends. The aggressors were kicked out and the bartender handled it professionally. She bought me a shot after witnessing their actions which I really appreciated. It was strange, their actions seemed like practiced behavior as if they were just looking for confrontation. It’s a shame when people throw around the words “racism” and “homophobic” so recklessly. It reduces its legitimacy and dehumanizes the people who suffer from its real effects. If those two come across this review… you got kicked out not because of your gender, race or orientation, you got kicked because you were rude. Five stars for the bar and five stars for the bartender.

There's a Spanish girl there that always serves me half shots and I'm over it. This place will never get another $$ out of me.. and I just move here literally across the street. SHE said it was a mistake because she grabbed a half shot... but 2 times. Not at $15 a shot of Don Julio darling. Extremely bias.. not interested.. and I always bring my guest over for a shot. Not to mention it's always dead empty when she's there. The guy bartender has honor and integrity... all his customers are treated the same. I appreciate that in a place of business.

Music is good but the SMELL??? Honestly, I don’t know the point of having a restroom when it smells like people can simply pick a corner. We couldn’t take it. It was cute in there and the music is good, but my nose is still burning and I’m not in there anymore. Yikes. Will not come back unless I develop a kink for urine aroma. Doubt it.

I started the night tipped the bartender. Ordered a Jack & Coke, it came in a 5oz glass for 10$ Tabbed out and did not hit tip(because I already did) and the bartender made a scene that I didn’t tip. She still wasn’t happy after I reminded her I handed her the tip. Killed my buzz. Liquor store outside<- worth nothing

It is with great sadness that I recount my recent experience at Jimmy Valentine’s, a place where I have typically found joy during their goth nights. My wife and I attended this past Saturday, hopeful for another enjoyable evening, but instead, we were met with disheartening treatment. As I approached the bar, I was repeatedly shoved aside by a white man who disregarded my presence in line. I chose to let it go and not escalate the situation, understanding that the bartender was busy. However, when it was finally our turn and my wife attempted to order, the same man pushed his way through again. The bartender began to take his order before we even had the chance to fully state ours. When I tried to explain the situation to her, I was met with rudeness and dismissiveness. I felt compelled to mention that it seemed as if her actions were influenced by racism or homophobia, given that she was prioritizing the man who had physically pushed me aside. Instead of addressing my concerns, the bartender exploded with anger, openly cursing at me, then tauntingly announcing that she was now giving the man a free shot because I had confronted her about her behavior. In a further display of unprofessionalism, she then turned her attention to the customer next to me, completely ignoring our presence. That customer, in disbelief, expressed sympathy for what I had endured. I decided it was best for my wife to remain silent, feeling painfully aware of the discrimination we were facing. When I reiterated my intention to write a review about this incident, the bartender aggressively told us we should leave if we were unhappy—and I expressed my love for the club, just not for her treatment of me. In disbelief, I walked away, only to find that she had summoned security to remove us without any hesitation. The DJ, who had witnessed the incident towards the end, kindly reached out to understand what had transpired, showing genuine concern. It was incredibly upsetting to realize that a place I once thought would be inclusive and safe had turned hostile. When the DJ spoke with security, they revealed that the bartender was already aware of the man’s actions toward me, further highlighting her unacceptable behavior. As a lesbian mixed woman, this encounter left me feeling deeply disheartened, especially knowing that the bartender was a Latina woman. It pains me to witness such treatment among women or anyone else for that matter. I had hoped for a far better experience at Jimmy Valentine’s, and it’s truly disappointing to feel marginalized in a space I wished to call a sanctuary. This experience reflects poorly on both the club and the bartender, leaving me with a heavy heart and a desire to share my story.

Great eclectic dive bar. Came here for a techno show. Low lit, friendly welcoming vibe. Basic drinks, decor has lots of skulls and behind the bar is filled with notes and pictures from patrons of years past. Small and cozy, not a fancy cocktail kinda place, but a place to let your hair down.

Wife and I had no intentions of going out, but we heard some bass from our Airbnb and it sounded good so we followed it and ended up here. Had one of our favorite nights out, music was great, people we’re super chill, place was intimate and decor was on point. Glad we stumbled on it!

The bouncer was being exceptionally rude to only me and came up to aggressively tell me to be more polite as I was trying to order drinks with my friends and the bartender was like “I’m Sorry I have to ask you to leave” so apparently business is booming lol.

Days other than Thursday, Friday, and Saturday may be a bit quiet and if the few people there aren't very talkative it may get a bit boring, but other than that this spot is awesome! They have different types of beers and a nice bartender. First, it was not easy to find the entrance because they don't have a clear sign showing where this bar is located. I was able to find only because I had the address from Yelp and the next door market helped me finding it. :) that is not a bad thing though-- I kinda liked the fact that it is a hidden bar. It gives a little mystery to it. It seemed like a bar that popped up from a scary movie. Spooky, a bit dark, people are having a good time, i loved it though. The representative of the beer brand Duvel was sitting next to me explaining that it's a great beer which is why I gave it a try. It was delicious and strong. Overall, there were not many other people to hangout with. However, my experience was good! I think I need to be back and try again for a 5-star-review.

Nice crowd and great energy. DJ's spinning some nice sounds as well on Saturday's. Check'em out. OneLove

Jimmy's spot always got me feeling some sorta way. It's perhaps the best bar in DC for fools like me. It gets two very important things right: the sound system is magnificent (make my body move in ways I didn't know it could) and the drinks are spot on. And not to mention the DJs working their black magickry with their mixes.

5 stars speaks for itself, but this says I need to write minimum of 85 characters so let me tell you about how dope this bar is... I'm not new to DC, but new to the bar scene. I love jv Nice little spot to escape the world, have a good time, and not have to worry about anyone or anything. Outstanding employees, even better service. Highly recommend.

DC sucks but Jimmy's is a neat spot for people tired of being around PMC types. Contingent on the DJs of the night and if they suit your tastes, Jimmy's is an excellent place to listen to some good music, get some good drinks, and dance. Cherry on top: the decor is phenomenal

My friend and I felt very unwelcomed in this space. The bartender accidentally hit me with the door at the entrance as we took pictures in the mirror- he said absolutely nothing. Whenwe walked in, everyone and I mean EVERYONE stared at us. We decided to leave immediately. Never have I felt that foreign in the city I grew up in.

Mr. Lethal is a serious man. Er slushy. He tastes like root beer and is so full of booze that you'll feel a little buzz after a quarter of one and be hammered after two. Take Mr. Lethal seriously because he earned his name. Anyways, this bar is great and I'm so sad it took me so long to get here. Their beer selection looks solid but Mr. Lethal is delicious and, well, lethal so I never made it to that part of the menu.

The atmosphere in this bar was interesting. I love red and the background made a great photo op. There was a dj playing what sounded like the same song for about two hours straight. Everyone seemed to be enjoying the music though. The bartender charged me five dollars for a PBR which is absolutely insane considering they're normally two dollars elsewhere. I'm assuming he knows I am from out of town and that he could get a couple bucks by doing that. Definitely a great place to go if you are a Juggalo.

Hot juggalo stole my heart, and made the best vodka soda of my entire life and yes I do know kelly.

Very cool Dive bar that's hidden away from the Main Street. There's a full bar and the beers are great and reasonably priced. We went in on a slow night but our bartender was very chill just like the place. The decorations are cool and it's nice to be able to have a different focal point t every where you look. I liked it- I cant wait to come back! BTW cash is preferred and they give a little bit of a discount for it.

Bar staff incredibly rude and nasty. They pick and choose who they let in the door. Place looks rundown and dirty. As you can see by the owners nasty disrespectful response that that energy is reflected and echoed throughout the hole in a wall establishment. DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME THERE

Good bar-bar Selection is pleasing People are (typically) cool JVLHC is packed with personality. That warrants two stars right up front. A great bartender adds another star, putting us in business overall. Relation to Little Miss Whiskey's lends a family air of coolness to boot... ...but no crowd except the three-pack I rolled in with, and a lone lady at the other end of the bar is less encouraging. It's not that I had a bad time, or there were bar shortcomings, but my enjoyment was curtailed by having to wonder what previously-mentioned lady's predicament was. At any rate, between the bartender and my party, we had some good stories, some good drink specials, and some good scrapbook photos of the former "pick-up-outlying-patrons-cuz-locals-is-too-sketched-out" business model's pyeempin' limousine. And two of my party were about as local as you get to Jimmy Valentine's. I like a good limousine story. I love a good bar with personality. I enjoy good bartenders. And still - might have to rate this less of a 3-star/4-star place, and more like "Incomplete" from my visit. There's a certain "modeled after bars of yore, and yet position and vibe ahead of its time" in-betweenness to Jimmy Valentine's. I don't suppose they'll ever specifically overcome that, but you can try it nevertheless. So really, that's it - 1) Drop by. 2) Have a drink. 3) Consider, then fall for, another drink. 4) Look around, consider your state, and decide for yourself. 5) Then walk out and admire the brilliant quilt on the facade of this goddamn bar, willyaplease? Thank you.

Super discreet, low key, dive bar #ftw. Honestly the hidden gem of the H St Corridor/Atlas area. The establishment is unmarked. You open the door to the bar with a string attached to the door handle. LOL. Marcus, the bartender was super chill. Suggested I try the Briney Melon Gose. It was pretty nice, had a pleasant sour bite to it. Only come for beers or whiskey type night. Most beers are $7 and under. Friday nights $1 tall boys starting at 8p--price increases hourly until 12a. No food. They may let you bring food in. Wish there was more of a full bar, since it's misty focused on beers. Cash only. Will come back whenever I feel like I wanna be in a Red Light District Man Cave.

Three and a half stars. Looking to get blackout drunk on boozy (and cloyingly sweet) root beer? Here ya go, have an appropriately dubbed Mr. Lethal for cashmonies. Lighting is dim, tunes are loud, bathroom reasonably clean if cramped, decor is plentiful with a vaguely Commie flair that borders on fetishism long before you spot the stuffed panda over the bar. Various chaise options besides the barstools. I had high hopes for oontzy beats to soothe a lonely heart but the DJ that night had other plans. Not sure how much in the way of shenanigans can happen in this small dive bar but I'd be willing to find out.

a hidden GEM in dc. on off nights it's kind of dead, with just a few regulars at the bar. but when they have local DJs it's fucking great. the kind of place where you go to REALLY dance, without creepy men bothering you. i went on a techno night and it was the closest thing to Berlin that you can find in DC. honestly, the type of thing I never would've expected to be able to find in DC. note: it's definitely the kind of vibe where you walk in and feel like everyone already knows each other. but i never felt unwelcome at all.

If you're looking for a going out spot in DC that makes you forget you're in DC, this is it. As a prior reviewer mentioned, you'll come here with your friend who's been before and walk a suspiciously long time to get there, to the point where you'll be seriously questioning said friend's judgment. Once in though, wow. It's like a hybrid between old punk dive and European dance club. The DJs seriously know their stuff. Maybe different nights are different, I've only been the once, but no Justin Bieber/Katy Perry/Drake at this bar. Just serious EDM beats and a crowd who clearly loves to dance. I was smiling nonstop the whole time I was at this place. The energy was infectious, and I only saw one hipster. The crowd is truly diverse and no one was giving an eff what anyone else thought. Did not partake of the famous root beer slushie but my usual vodka sodas did me fine. I'm told the owners of this joint also own my other favorite divey spot in DC, Little Miss Whiskey's, which has the coolest backyard to hang out in. I look forward to another night at JV next time I'm in DC.

Been here many times to enjoy the good tunes, nice beer selection, mood/atmosphere spot on, pleasant bartenders. A place with real character; the type of place you wish there was more of in DC. Root beer slushy is always fun, as is trying to figure out what is going on with the wall decorations (and fellow patrons). If you don't like cigarettes, don't go out the back door, since there's a small stairwell with crammed many people chatting and puffing away. Don't order the pizza, it's just a small microwave thing a sucks balls. But I think it's there more as a joke as every bar has to have some kind of food. Was always fun to take someone from out of town here as the last stop after a few places H street. It would let you know how much they really trust you. But the area has developed so much in the last 5 years that you can walk here fine and they have plenty of neon signs to identify itself. Solid late night option with character.

If this is your last stop of the evening before checking out at like 2:00 AM, you are in big trouble. Why, you might ask? It's because of the epic Mr. Lethal - unctuously laden with immeasurable quantities of Everclear masquerading as an innocent kind of slushy root beer-flavored drink. And if you don't start seeing doubles of things right after your first one, more power to you. If you can grin and bear the temptation of this delicious yet appropriately-named concoction, you are in for a pleasant time at jimmy Valentine's Lonely Hearts Club. Getting to Jimmy Valentines requires a little bit of patience and open-mindedness to put it lightly. In all likelihood, most people come here via H street which requires the treacherous transit through the infamous "Starburst Crossing." My solution: Simply walk on the other side of the street (where the CVS is) and avoid all that nonsense because it doesn't get any better until you've gotten past the 7-11. By the time you get to Jimmy V's - you should be able to safely cross to the warm embrace of the red velvet-colored Jimmy Valentines. (This trip from the end of H Street should have taken you a whopping 7 minutes by the way - DEEP). Expect a palatable drink menu, reasonable prices, and decently friendly staff most nights. The music can be cumbersome in some days (I think my first experience was off-putting because of this weird electric Micronesian trance music with grunting sounds) but incredible other days (My memorization of just about every Led Zeppelin song really seemed to strike a good chord to some of the other patrons). Given the moody red atmosphere, the artwork adds a new surreal dimension - think pop art accented by political shock art - brazen and ballsy to say the least. I can only imagine what some of the more sensitive and weak-stomached folks coming from say Sticky Rice would think...

Part of me wants to say this place is awesome, eclectic, kinky, divey and a hidden gem. Part of me wants to say don't go unless you're tripping on something. It's really small and interesting, and the dj played pretty good music. But at some point the red lights and thumping music and weird art made me think I was the only one there not high. I'd probably go back...

Yelp categorizes Jimmy V's as a dive bar. It is, but in a good way. A couple of friends and I stopped in to check out a house music set, featuring a few local DJs. The place threw us off because we walked into the bar and right onto the dance floor!You can literally dance your way to the bar. No matter, the vibe and the crowd were cool, and the music got everybody going all night. At other Yelpers' suggestions, we got a round of the Mr. Lethals... root beer-flavored concoctions that ain't for chumps!

Just a couple of blocks down from the H Street corridor lies the unmarked Jimmy Valentine's Lonely Hearts Club. Inside, one can find a truly bizarre set of artwork, rather exceptional music, and perhaps one of the strongest alcoholic concoctions in the entire city (the appropriately named Mr. Lethal). The choices in artwork have been best described by Matthew M: "Maoist kitsch, ghoulish paraphernalia, and random un-PC odds and ends lining the walls." That review was written in 2008 but it certainly still holds true. The music is largely dependent on the night of the week and the particular DJ, but expect anything ranging from classic rock to dubstep to South African dance music (not in the same night). If you don't like the music one night, there is a strong chance you will be delighted with the choices the very next night. What does not change is the strength of the aforementioned Mr. Lethal. This slushie drink appears to have been spiked with copious amounts of everclear all hidden by the sugary goodness of the root beer. The chances of you blacking out if you drink more than 5 of these are approximately 1156%. I'd suggest a slight level of caution although I'll add that this is the type of place that is probably best enjoyed without regard to inhibition. Much has been made about the location of this bar being in an unsafe neighborhood. It is a five block walk, if that, from H Street. Unless you are a complete asshole, you should be fine. If you are looking for a less boisterous rendition of the H Street scene that highlights the more eclectic aspects of the neighborhood, you will probably like this bar.

This place is epic. You will follow your one friend who has been there before, pass the Argonaut and turn left and then walk for a suspiciously long time. Long enough to doubt your friend's judgement, choice and overall sanity. But then, you finally make it and enter a room that looks like a hipster brothel (in a good way). You'll saunter up to the bar and discover that on Fridays PBR starts at $1 and goes up every hour. You will get slightly heckled by the only other two people in there, who tell you you missed $2 PBR by 5 minutes. CURSES. We were outnumbered by the staff for the first hour or so (10:00-11:00ish) and then suddenly people were coming in in droves. It's not a huge bar and there aren't a TON of seats, so maybe get there before 11:30 if you want a seat. Great place to grab a drink and impress your friends - just be prepared for doubt to set in on the walk over. And then you'll get home and look this place up on Yelp and be like THEY HAD ROOT BEER SLUSHIES?!? #fail. Next time.

Now that I am safely installed in sweet my new SF digs, and no longer have a vested interest in keeping this bar douchebag-free, I feel legitimately able to ruin Jimmy V's for everyone I left behind by writing a review and doing my part to get the word out. Suck it, nerds. To put it succinctly, Jimmy Valentine's is, as a wise man once said, the dog's bollocks. First of all, they sell 40s of Natty Boh at the bar which, if you're a fucking hipster, is awesome. For the rest of us, they can haz a small selection of single malts. Secondly, Digital Love, third Saturdays of the month, curated by Ratt Moze and Chris Nitti, where I was introduced to the cult of little Lemz, who featured prominently in another of my drunken reviews because DUBSTEP: big, fat rolling bass, South London flavour and Baltimore style, sick beats to make you, and the rather eclectic crowd, move groove and grind and stumble into walls. Mixtaaaape: http://soundcloud.com/lemz/dark-planet-records-presents-go-hard Smoker's area is out back, a very cold and damp semi-indoor crypt of concrete stairwell covered in cigarette butts and graffiti. You will make friends. You will have to cuddle up to people for warmth and because there is no space and because you are kiiind of hammered. When you leave you either have to wobble back to H or, if you have good taxi karma, you just might catch the one cab for some inexplicable reason is driving along Bladensburg at 3:30am despite it being -10C outside and freaking Trinidad.

Jimmy Valentine's is in the rarefied stratum of bars that can successfully thrive in an unlikely location with not so much as a sign on the door signifying its existence. Opened in mid-2007 by three young, local entrepreneurs with experience in local nightlife who wanted to provide a low-key hangout for their friends and community members, JV's occupies the faceless former storefront of a tax preparation office. Inside the double set of doors (and velvet curtains) from the faceless storefront with nothing but "1103" on the mailbox lies a crimson bordello of Maoist kitsch, ghoulish paraphernalia, and random un-PC odds and ends lining the walls. To your left is the DJ stand; the owners have an established policy of no music with misogynistic or violent lyrics, just an amazing mix of classic rock, funk, and other milieu-appropriate music. On the right side of the door (at least as of last month) sat a small fake casket full of body part gummy candy. The bartenders are friendly and personable. Operating on a cash-only basis, they serve all sorts of bottled beers, from high-falutin' stuff right down to Mickey's and Sparks, and 40s of Schlitz (on top of your standard mixed drinks). Many drinks are served in mismatched glasses sourced from thrift stores. Red Baron pizzas are on hand to soak it all up. If you get this place, you'll love it. Otherwise, don't bother. A few neighbors lodged a complaint with the alcohol licensing authorities over JV's operations, claiming they were attracting miscreants and dragging down the neighborhood. The government investigation this past summer found that JV's is a model business in compliance with each and every regulation. My experience there leads me to believe the owners of JV's went out on a huge limb to take a chance on a sometimes sketchy area with virtually no nightlife for blocks around and create a positive, understated environment for discerning adults that's a boon to the neighborhood and local economy. I wish them nothing but success and hope it anchors a natural extension of the H Street corridor.

I have to echo the other reviewers, it almost feels wrong to write a review of this hidden little gem. A chef friend of mine literally had to drag me to this place, it was a Tuesday night at 12:30 and I really should have been going to bed, but he was like "its the greatest bar in the world." In my experience saying that usually means that expectations will be unfairly high and the person who was dragged to the bar will be disappointed. Let me tell you...this is not the case with Jimmy's. First of all at almost 1am on a Tuesday night there was only one patron and the proprietor in the place. Sounds, like I'm gonna be disappointed, right? Not at all, it was the coolest bar even if we were the only ones there. The decor was fantastic; red walls, awesome artwork a odds&ends collection of glassware, t-shirts hanging from the ceiling, and you can't for get to check out the funky salt and pepper shaker collection that has an almost hallowed spot on the wall behind the bar. If you rolled up the Red Derby, the Raven, Dito's Bar (@Floriana), and DC9 all into one you'd end up with Jimmy Valentine's. Drinks? The got them! Its got a full bar and I mean full. The selection is almost as cool as the atmosphere. High-end vodkas (VanGogh, etc) to almost any liquor to "low-end" beers (Colt 45) and that's just the beginning...you can't forget about the selection of Belgian brews! Food? They have some, not really sure what...but they minimally have Red Baron Pizza - I don't remember why, but there was a story to go along with it. Just ask Mark, the owner...he'll tell you. (btw, if you haven't had Red Baron Pizza lately, I have to say it was delicious, but I'm not sure if that was the alcohol, the lateness, or the growling in my stomach talking!) And you can't forget about Guiness, the owner's absolutely amazing dog, who occassionally makes an appearance. He's like a horse, part Mastif and part Great Dane, absolutely huge! But probably the most docile dog I've ever met. I'm 6ft tall and his head was easily at my elbows! There might not be a single bad thing to say about Jimmy's! THE BEST BAR IN DC. PERIOD. BC - Quite possibly the most creative restroom signs I've ever seen and as for the bathroom itself - the men's is baby blue! I mean everything in it is baby blue: the tile, the paint, the sink, the floor, with the one notable exception being the toilet; which you guessed it is baby pink! And I didn't have the foresight to check, but apparently the women's room is all pink. I thought only my great-grandmother had a pink toilet!

I went to JV's Lonely Hearts Club several months ago, and I haven't been back since. No, it's not what you think - it's just that this bar really messed me up. I didn't know which way was up, couldn't figure out how to go the few blocks to my friend's house, passed out with my head outside the car door, threw up all over said door... yeah. What the hell happened? It was like passing through the bar entrance = passing through a time machine to my sophomore year in college, the last time something like this happened to me. Then again, the random chick who bought us espresso vodka shots probably has something to do with that. She probably had something to do with the random text messages we received that night too, one that said "hola" and one that simply said "thong speed" (!). No-frills dark bars (lots of black/darkness, red lights) like this actually remind me of home - locals' bars in ATX, or the ATX of yore. Maybe my yearning for home will win out soon and make me go back, because to tell you the truth, I'm still afraid.

Pretty cool spot. Chill, decent music selection, cheap delicious drinks. The bar tender was attentive and made good drinks. I asked for an Irish mild, he didn't know what it was so he asked and then obliged. Nice to see that still happens!

First off, this is not for people who want to party at Dream, Love or whatever it's called......This is more for grown folk who want to relax and doesn't mind how the night may play out. It started out dark, cave like with interesting art deco. Gave me a groovy baby feel. The service was great along with strong drinks. I thought it would be mellow the whole night but then the DJ started spinning and everyone that was hanging at the bar somehow ended up dancing all night long. I was ready to head home around 12am but the DJ saved my night. I guess looks can really be deceiving because I thought I'd be hearing house all night.....the DJ, a skinny white boy with tatoos definitely proved me wrong when he spun 90's hip hop (my fave) with a mix of some more oldies but goodies (I went Saturday night). This was my plan B but has now become my plan A! I love this hidden treasure of a bar.........

I don't even know if I should be writing this review, lest I feel the wrath of its clientele who wish to maintain the bar's low profile. But this place is just too unique to ignore. Jimmy Valentine's is definitely one of DC's more secretive spots. The lack of any signage, as well as its location in an area that would scare away most casual bar hoppers helps make it a true neighborhood spot. I was only alerted to its existence by a friend who lives right off of H St. For all those people who think they are "troopers" for making the trip to the H St. bars, you really have no idea until you make the trek to this place. Completely non-descript from the outside, I was surprised by how colorful and vibrant the place is inside. It's got ample room for both lounging and dancing, and if my experience there was any indication, they have good DJ's to get people moving. I don't remember anything standing out to me on the drink menu, but the bartenders were very nice, and the people there were all having a good time. That's what you want from a neighborhood bar, right? Its location right by Trinidad is going to keep a lot of people away, but maybe that's for the better, as it would be a shame to see a place like this taken over by the standard bar crowds. I wish it was more accessible for me to get to, but it's definitely a place you should try and check out at least once if you can. You won't believe a place like this actually exists until you make it inside...

DC Hipster and Arlington Yuppie bars could learn a lot from these folks. Margot is an excellent bartender. A beautiful, yet approachable girl who fixes your drink with a bit of care making you feel like you're not just another patron of another watering hole. If you balk at the neighborhood because of *ahem* the demographics, you're missing out. Generally, it's a relatively safe neighborhood (as much as any part of DC). Just remember the rules of any urban environment: nothing of value visible in your car, don't act like a rube when walking to the club and back to your car. It's really that simple. Wasteland Fridays are super fun time w/ some good old school goth rock and alternative oldies. For those of us who actually remember that the 80's weren't all Madonna & Cindi Lauper, it's paradise.

By the time the bartender (who rocked, BTW) at Jimmy Valentine's Lonely Hearts Club told me they were the sister bar to Little Miss Whiskey's Golden Dollar, I had already figured it out. If you don't know, you can pretty much tell. Dim lights, eclectic décor, and alcohol-infused root beer slushies created a familiar vibe. The funny thing is, I really like Jimmy Valentine's and I really hate Little Miss Whiskey's. I might end up hating it on a busy night, when the hipsters crowd the place, but so far, I'm willing to go back. Shout out to Kelly for introducing me to Jimmy Valentine's!

This is a gem. The place to go when you're not looking to be knocked into by sweaty people at Rock and Roll - the mild fright you will feel walking down Bladensburg and into the unmarked door are all part of the ambiance. But seriously, PBR tallboys starting at $1 on Fridays at 8pm (and it'll be empty at 8pm), increasing by $1 per hour past that. Bizarre communist themed decor, a red-lit bathroom, and an awesome back smoking staircase. Not for the high-maintenance.

I've live on the east coast since the mid 90s. In that time, I've been to DC multiple times, both on vacation and hanging out with friends. But every time I'd been, I always had this feeling that I was kind of on the outside looking in. Just another tourist in a city that's full of them. This all changed when I was instructed to go to Jimmy Valentine's. No door sign, no windows, no phone number, no website... no problem! This may sound a little intimidating, but it's worth the effort to find it. The interior is quite cool. Dark with comfortable seating and a well-stocked bar (save beer on tap). Great music too. When the DJs were gearing up to play, I was expecting The Cure and possibly Horton Heat. And what I got was an unexpected mix of Reggae, Dub and House, that was particularly awesome. I'm not sure if the cat's going to be let out of the bag and the crowd thus lame by the next time I get there, but I certainly hope not. This place is special, DC. Treat it that way.

This place is a gem in an otherwise inconspicuous neighborhood. It's located along an awkward stretch of Bladensburg Road, which is neither near H Street nor New York Avenue. For the uninitiated, you will need to keep the address (1103 Bladensburg Rd NE) on hand since there is no sign warning you of its location. The first time I came here I almost left because there was no sign and otherwise no sign of life from any other businesses in the area. Once inside, you will be cloaked in a warm red light, which beckons bars in cozy corners of European cities. Come on Friday nights for $1 PBR tallboys, starting at 8 PM (which increase in price $1 every hour til midnight). Root Beer slushies are good too, but beware of the alcohol, which will sneak up on you. Music is what I call "eclectic" ranging from dubstep to Ethiopian electronica... so be prepared for that. Fair warning: the pizza is just Ellio's supermarket brand, but is sufficient to soak up any excess booze that might accumulate (which it will!). Good to know: Transit around here is pretty sparse, so plan on calling a cab (I used TaxiMagic app on iPhone to summon a cab, which beats waiting outside or being on hold). With the closing of Capitol City Diner across the street, you will need to walk up to Denny's for any late-night gastronomical adventures or down to H Street.

If Little Miss Whiskeys is the cool, nice rock & roller guy that you went to high school with, than Jimmy Valentine's is his very sexy older brother. This place exudes an effortless cool, from staff to decor. good selection, good djs, What more could you possibly want? Root beer flavoured slushie, you say? They got that too!

Jimmy's. The inspiration for much yelper poetry. You're like the ex that I still hook up with--familiar and comfortable, while still a little dark and sexy. I can go chill with a beer on your couches all night, or I can drink a lil' booze and end up dancing seductively in my silly hat. (Maybe the ex has a cowgirl fetish.) The point is, Jimmy's is unique enough to make you want to go there while being expansive (not expensive) enough to be what you want it to be. It has quality beer and well-mixed (STRONG) cocktails. It can be sexy, goofy, friendly, or mysterious, depending on which corner you're looking at. Bring a dozen friends, or go by yourself. Dance, talk, drink, or sober-people watch. If you're looking for a place that's alluring, easy, and drama-free (much like that ex, right? See what I did there??) you should be at Jimmy's.

Jimmy Valentine's is hard to find as a result of the no sign thing. Keep your eyes out for the Hooptie Limo parked out front. Seriously. I hear that you can get a ride home if you ask nicely. It's the awesomest DC's got . . . Just go.

Just went this past Friday after dinner and drinks on H st. And wow what a treat. The place is nothing like most spots in DC. Come in. Grab a drink. Enjoy the music. Feel the vibe. Have fun all night. Excellent liquor selection as I was shocked. Apparently a good beer selection but I don't drink beer. Nice DJ. Spinning some house. The crowd was super diverse which I loved the most. Diverse in color and age and other variations. Everyone was there to have a good time. Even found parking fairly easy. I definitely plan to go back and likely will dance a bit more. Oh the young lady tending bar was super cool as well.

Saturday night first impression: Seedier version of Little Miss Whiskey's filled with 20-somethings who want to feel edgy. There was a dj and dancing by the front door, which compacted the space for the rest of us who wanted a drink and a conversation. The beer selection was mediocre, and the more unusual stuff clearly doesn't see much turnover - the hops in my IPA were so old they smelled like spoiled milk. Things might be better on a different night with different people although the space, crowd, and beverage selection/quality at JV's sister on H St. are still much preferable.

Countless times (when I wasn't looking for it), I drove past this place and wondered what was going on. So when I read some yelp reviews and decided to check it out, I figured I'd have no problem finding it because I knew exactly where I was. Still, I walked past the entrance twice before two "locals" who were hanging out on the corner told me to turn and open the door in front of me. Look for the pink halo! Jimmy Valentine's is chill. Like its sister spot, Little Miss Whiskey's, the owner and bartenders are wonderful! I attended a fundraising function here to benefit an after-care/activity program at a local school. Catered with the delicious food from Capital City Diner across the street and with a great DJ, the event was nice. Up top to Jimmy Valentine's and Cap City Diner for their magnanimity and concern for our neighborhood kids in need! On Sunday nights, they show Boardwalk Empire followed by Mad Men. Other nights, they have DJs spinning some cool mixes. I'm not a beer drinker, but they have tons from which to choose if you are. Cheers!

My words can not accurately portray what this place is: Awesome dive bar in DC. Very chill. Cheap drinks. Not crowded. Can't find something like this on U street. Need to come here and experience this. What every bar should be.

Swung by randomly and OMG the DJ spinning was absolutely killing it! Deep minimal house beats blaring out of this iconically decorated spot. Drinks weren't too impressive but it seems like a "let's get smashed and dance" kinda spot. Smoking area in the back was pretty small. Also gotta admit, surrounding area neighborhood seemed pretty sketch. I would advise to go in large groups not solo. Careful when walking back to your cars. All in all, WORTH checking out.

Imagine if Wonderland were actually good; that's Jimmy Valentine's. Been to Jimmy's twice now and to paraphrase Billy Dee Williams, it's worked every time. The decor and alcohol selection are great (I especially like the authentically served Tecate) and the place tries to foster a real sense of community. Their resident DJ's are good by DC standards; they would probably be rather average in a more musically dynamic city, though. The location in Trinidad keeps out the amateurs and suburbanites and makes me nostalgic for my days in Detroit. Any fear of coming out to this neighborhood is misplaced; you are probably more at risk in Adams Morgan. You may have a bit of trouble catching a cab home, though, so driving is recommended - with a designated driver, of course. Odds are you'll be able to park right in front of the door. Although this place tries to be inconspicuous the secret is out and you can expect it to be a bit crowded on the weekends. The crowd is much more interesting than the H Street crowd, though.

This is the type of place that you ONLY go to if you can tolerate a little weirdness and dont like things all polished and clean and perfect. Because this place is not polished...nor is it clean...or perfect. I went a while ago with a bunch of friends, and it was dubstep night. I like dubstep, my friends didn't know what it was--so suffices to say I had a lot more fun that they did. And the place is great. It has history. It's like your gramma's secret box where she has pictures of her exes and random little mementos from her life. Plus alcohol. It's great. Has a homey, judgment-free feel to it. But be careful, it's not it the best neighborhood. Although I hear it's much safer than places like Gtown, and that actual crime rates in the neighborhood are very low--lower than one would have thought! Have fun!

I was brought here by a friend of a friend we ran into at the Rock and Roll Hotel on H St, and really enjoyed this hole in the wall. There's definitely a speakeasy feel to the place, as the windows are blacked out and there is no sign except for a red and blue light at the top of the building. When you enter, you're welcomed with a DJ spinning, an eclectic mix of wall art, and various shrines to Cupid (above the bar) and Lindsay Lohan (in the bathroom). It's cash only, but there's an ATM ($2.50 fee) in a phone booth at the back of the bar. I started with a Sunrise, which was a bit too syrupy for my taste, so I tried the Mr. Lethal (root beer + everclear slushie), which was definitely a hit. The atmosphere of the place was really great. It was hopping, but not too busy, and the DJ played some great beats and I enjoyed myself on the dance floor for a bit. There's an alley out back for smokers, and two bathrooms at the rear, which are a bit cramped and slightly dirty, but what do you really expect from a hidden gem dive bar like this? I'd definitely go back, and will most definitely get another Mr. Lethal.

One of the best dive bars in the city, hands down. There is a no sign outside the door and looks pretty creepy from the outside, and honestly a little creepy from the inside as well. But the place is so chill, with a great beer list and a tendency to attract eclectic clientele which always make for interesting conversations and absolutely ridiculous nights! There is nothing pretty about this place, well other than the beer selection, but that makes it all the better.

Well, this place is a dive. It's on Bladensburg Road Northeast, not far from the fun and trendy and changing H Street Corridor. The barkeep introduced me to an impossible to find white ale - Calabaza Blanca, brewed in Ann Arbor by Jolly Pumpkin. The only other place I've seen it is at The Greene Grape, a independent grocer in Brooklyn. The decor is creepy, red lighting mixed with Dia De Los Muertes skulls and just odd knick nacks and nostalgia. The art is cool, and they have boozy root beer floats. Find this place if you want a spot off the beaten path that won't be too crowded. Be aware though, only about 40 people could fit in here with any semblance of comfort. I recommend bringing a friend. I've passed it before, en route to other places, and I returned recently during Happy Hour and me and my buddy were the only people in there. Also, keep in mind this is an unmarked bar. Above the iron gates over the windows, is a blank sign that glows pink when illuminated. You'll miss it if you're not paying attention.

All the best things about dive bars exist here. Moody lighting, hilarious-no-nonsense bartenders, strange frozen drinks, interesting art, FUN djs with nothing to prove but that they can make people dance and beautiful mosaic skulls. Go, shake a tail feather and have a drink with other lonely hearts.

What can I say about this place that hasn't already been said? It's a dive bar in the nether regions of H St. that is only accessible via cab unless you want to brave the sketchy streets of NE. I have only been twice but I loved it each time. It stands alone and is easy to spot (just look at the lovely mural outside or the hearts on the door) and is great for the bar adventurer. I went because of the accolades it has received and the fact that they play Dubstep which is few and far in between in DC. When you take a look at the interior you can easily tell that Little Miss Whiskeys Golden Dollar took some inspiration when they decorated their bar (to me it essentially looks the same except that the lights are red instead of purple). Both times I have been it has been sketchy and filled with true hipsters and I loved it (I am not a hipster BTW). I fancy myself a big drinker but I had 3 of the notorious root beer slushies that put me over the top so beware. The bar is cash only so keep that in mind and go with groups. A must go for an bar enthusiast.

Non-hipsters beware - this is not your typical H Street bar. Jimmy's most closely mirrors its sister bar, Little Miss Whiskey's, but is really in a league of its own. Jimmy V's is really a pioneer establishment - the first on Bladensburg Rd where many more are sure to follow in the near future. If you haven't been yet, go, because this place is a DC institution! Remember to bring cash. Beer selection is excellent. This is a great dance party location (think Saint-Ex about 5+ years ago) with excellent DJs and extremely loud music. Just don't use the bathroom.