S G.
Yelp
Where does one begin...
I was here in Sept 2023, and it seemed OK ( not spectacular by any stretch..) so I returned in October 2024....
1. Front desk agent was livid that I came In To check in...there was nobody in the lobby other than me...she had to put her phone down as I interrupted text discussions. I actually think I will start using the app to check in so I can avoid the nastiness. ( and perhaps it's time to upgrade to AI check in..)
2. The room/property is quite dated..., the rooms are so early 90s hard to believe that an Autograph can still hold the status..., while the room(s) still has a coffee machine from the early 90s, mine as expected , didn't work at all. So it's a broken product placed in the room to use...really cool IF the vibe your are looking for is (partial) Retro, which may actually organically just happen if they keep their current decor. ( pretty much everywhere) I digress. I was Embarrassed for the room...to even consider placing something as outdated as a 90s non working coffee machine in a guest room, but here we are.
Oh and speaking of decor, The chargers on (also 90s ) lamps which look like they belong in the Southwest, several outlets don't work. But at this point that's minor and to be expected of something that looks so outdated for this type of hotel..
3. I asked the front desk agent only one thing , since she was so upset I came in to check in ... to place me in a room with a washer AND dryer, I had this set up Last year, it was a big plus.., so naturally given this experience...I was given the opposite of what I asked for, the Combo washer /dryer , which left me clothes damp when I was checking out....takes time to dry clothes in combos...but I had to check out.
4. The breakfast , I was there around 7 am, there were 3 occupied tables including mine... Between the time I sat down and the time I was asked what I would like to order, 15 minutes went by, yes not even an ice water. But, there were MUCH more interesting things happening at the restaurant ...the entire staff was heavily engaged in personal story telling and making fun of others. Literally heard the entire deep discussion bc they were so loud.
I finally got my coffee around 7.30...again just coffee and my avocado sandwich arrived at 7.50 am.. ohh! And my fave as far as absolute lack of Any professionalism, was when the waitress referred to me as "hon"... again super cool if it's the Retro rebranding you are looking for. Felt quite Diner, actually.
5. Since I'm an elite member , I asked for 2 o'clock check out. This is when I was lectured by the operator that it doesn't mean much against availability...It is difficult for me to believe my one room being pushed to 2 pm was going to absolutely skew all hotel operations. The irony...multiple mentions were made that the cleaning crew was available from 9 to 5, but at this point I expected no less ....
6. My breakfast was to get $ credit since I'm an elite member, so naturally I was charged for it, when I called to ask to adjust , I was given a Speech by the agent that it applies to dinner..., I got in around 9.30 pm
Wasn't gonna start eating at 10 pm...the agent said I can use it for breakfast during my check in...
Absolutely will never stay here again, and will be sure to let everyone I know not to come anywhere near this place.
I stayed at the Autograph on the Big Island, NOW that's an Autograph! Next to the level of professionalism and customer service, Koloa Landing doesn't qualify for the status. It's some kind of a misunderstanding Koloa holds a luxury status at all.
Only 2 positives, Bellman who helped me with my luggage was a very pleasant individual.
The pool is great as long as you don't have 150 children screaming as you're trying to swim. For quiet and smaller crowd, night swimming is great. I did it last year, it's a very nice experience.
I really hope the Owners of this hotel will actually read this review. That's who needs to see what's happening.
Anyway, we'll never return , and certainly hope you guys will embrace AI much sooner than later, so guests dont have to experience so much unprofessionalism, and employees no longer have to work in ( very basic) hospitality they seem to know nothing about. (Certainly no aloha here, but didn't expect such an elevated experience after the chilly check in)
If you've never been to Kauai, highly recommend many amazing wonderful properties where people are very pleasant. I have been to several properties on Kauai. I have met fantastic employee, and had lovely experiences.
This wasn't it .