Fox E.
Yelp
It's been 10 minutes, and I'm DUE
For another drink from Kung FU
So now I'm going to rap for YOU
And if it really sucks, just BOO
So if you and your bf are THROUGH
And you need something (someone) to DO
Let me show you how my legend "GREW"
And all my urban myths are TRUE
Be glad your sister never KNEW
What we did, or she'd want me TOO
So do me like they do the DEW
And I'll stick atop you like GLUE
There is no taming of this SHREW
I'll be the driver, you the SCREW
You the river, me CANOE
Or you can be Barbie's sexy SHOE
Me Roger Daltrey, you the WHO
You Chinatown Houston, me LOU
Me dictator, you my COUP
You Nepal, me KATHMANDU
You 80s radio, me CUTTING CREW
You a doctor's office, me the FLU
You the Synagogue, me the JEW
You the toilet, me the POO
Wait, what
Anyway
Those boys will have to join the QUEUE
And wait until I'm done with YOU
You'll bounce like a KANGAROO
Cause we're lovers, not fighters like FOO
And when we're done (in a day or TWO)
After I've made your kitty MEW
And after I've finally WITHDREW
Then it's time to go to Kung FU!
WHAT
My most recent trip, I brought the goddess for the first time. It was windy AF outside and awful walking in - and out - of here. But once inside, Barbie and I had a nice experience at this KFT and she really enjoyed her lemon black tea thoroughly. What we didn't enjoy was being abused by the employees at the Courtyard around back when we were leaving.
This KFT has nice decor as well - and good service. But not always the best service cuz some of the late shift employees were a little standoffish about it being closing time (10 mins before, actually), and they closed the front door (locked it), pointing us to the back which actually ended up being more convenient for the parking lot, but still it's pretty bad customer service.
But now for all the good factors - starting with the drinks we love.
What to get: Lemon Black Tea With Tapioca!
Or: All the fruit teas are pretty good, especially if you go off menu and get black tea!
Or: Go crazy and order your fruit teas with the very strong Oolong!
Or in winter: Any of the hot milk teas!
Which milk teas are best: Honey Oolong! Oolong! Maybe Taro or Almond! I also love the regular milk tea with Oreo!
My earlier assessment (pre-bringing Barbie here) was even more glowing:
This is one of the best Kung Fu tea locations I've ever been to. Yes they have their issues - sometimes their equipment doesn't work, and it can make some of the employees a little bit down on the place, but what they don't realize is that they are working at one of the best locations there is, all things considered. The owner also has a spot which is similar, but much shinier and newer (but similarly challenging to park at) down in Kent at Kent State Uni.
Employees here were great to me. They are super friendly and super nice and they make their drinks exceptionally well. The Boba is perfect in texture and has that lovely sweet KFT taste. The lemon black tea is literally one of the most enjoyable versions of this amazing drink that I've ever had. I would put it straight into my top five KFT locations in the country. I should have tried it sooner and will definitely come back whenever in Cleveland.
On the negative side... Wait times can be long, parking is a nightmare, but then when you're the only good bubble tea shop in the whole Cleveland area what do you expect?
Edit: Since that glowing review, I've had the trip with Barbie, which was more mixed, but I'd still put this place as one of the top 10% of KFTs I've been to - and I've been to a hell of a lot.
So if you think your life is now over
And your gf won't let you disrobe her
And you ask what I think
Just come get a drink
Kung Fu's Lemon Black Tea with Boba!