Johnny N.
Google
In my vision quest to find the best grocery store rotisserie chicken on this pale blue dot, Morton Williams is next up. They have 15 locations all in Manhattan, and a good amount of people recommended this one, which I will never understand why.
I walked in, and had a bad feeling when the interior was just a little grungy. I walked around for a bit before I found the tissi’s in the back corner. They were marketed as “Everyday Low Price! Rotisserie Chickens, $9.99 each.” So you can imagine my dismay when the whole chicken ran $15.99.
I stood there, a whole bird in one hand and a plastic 12oz Evian water bottle in the other, with my brow furrowed and my lips puckered as if to say “damn they’re really doing me like this…”
I swallowed my pride and checked out. I took it to this beautiful little park right next door and ripped into this chicken with my bare hands.
This was head and shoulders the worst grocery store chicken I have had to date. The breast was as dry as the Sahara desert, the skin had this rub on it that looked promising but had no flavor, and even the leg was dry. It was just all bad. A soulless chicken. The fact I had paid $15.99 for this hurt bad. I’m convinced this was karma for something I have done in this life or a past one, so I needed to accept this was my fault.
The score came in at a whopping 5/10, which was a little generous to be honest. It currently ranks 14 out of 14 on my list of grocery store chickens.
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