24 K.
Yelp
Everyone's got a dark secret, or everyone has done some f.cked up thing in life they don't want anyone to know about, I'm gonna share my dark dirty secret that I'm not proud of to the world. Here it is; I like Pizza Hut's pan pizza with extra cheese and triple of every non-pork and anchovies toppings. The pizza ends up weighing like 45 pounds. Pizza so good I would punch my Grammy in the face for it. When I wanna feel like a tow truck driver and not care about my health, sodium intake, fat intake and my actions' impact, I Order this pizza. This is like heroin, it'll relax you and put you to sleep. Happiness is a warm gun, I mean cheesey gooey pizza (think Beetles). You should need a prescription for this sh.t, seriously!! Fuck ambiance, you run out, order this sh.t. The next day, you look at yourself in the morning in the mirror and say, did I fu.kin just do that last night? Damn, I hate myself, the guilt starts and the shame. Why do I put myself through this misery? The answer, a 8.5 minute mouth ecstasy, a taste sensation. The next morning, bloated and still full, you walk to your car to go to work with your head down. F you, don't judge me!