Andrew B.
Yelp
Wow, so I have been here once so I can only assume that the experience that I am about to enlighten you yelpers of is normal.
Walk in. Typical P-town dive. Lots of smoke, dirt, grit but seemingly familiar and comfortable. Wow, seriously I don't even know where to begin. So we (Rob and I) spot the shuffleboard table, really the only reason we decided to go here, and proceed to grab two pints and the weights.
The peeps below are certainly correct when they say that it is tightly packed in there. So we ask the people beside us, very politely, if they would like to join us in a friendly competition of shuffleboard. They gladly accepted. Enter hammered dude #1 (hereafter referred to as HD1) and a lady friend of his.
So great! Here we go, right? Wrong. Oh so wrong. HD1 seems to be more interested in his peeps than he is in the current game of shuffleboard, basically neglecting the game entirely. FYI- if you start a bar game do me a favor and finish it. No, I don't want to hear about your new kicks, or that chick you banged, or blah blah blah.
Anyway, HD1 takes offense (surprise surprise) to my encouragement for him to finish the game he started. After he, mind you I am sober, made his in-depth knowledge of every profane word there is in the English language known he decides he wants to "take it outside"- classy right? At this point he seems to be losing it over the mere fact that I am playing it as calm as I can, even smiling as he exerts his massive vulgar vocabulary.
The barkeep sees what is happening and proceeds to tell HD1 that he needs to leave. Enter hammered dude #2, HD2, who just happens to be a regular, oh yeah, and seems to be at least 6'1" and say 280 lbs or so. HD2 proceeds to get up and just clock HD1 right in the kisser at least 3 or 4 times consecutively right as HD1 is running his mouth. At this point everybody's jaw is to the floor in that "is this really happening?!" sort of way. In any case HD1 stumbles and just so happens to stumble towards me, er, to me.
So here we are, just 20 minutes after I stepped foot in the Speakeasy for the first time and I'm helping HD1 (the guy that just 5 minutes earlier wanted to fight me) to the exit as I am asking him if the bear paw of a fist that just dented his head did any serious damage. Meanwhile HD2 resumes his regular place at the bar and I am left so perplexed at what the hell just happened that the only thing I can do is drink the free PBR the barkeep so graciously gave me. It was a classic "what the fuck just happened" moment.
Four stars just for the entertainment of seeing a cocky HD1 running his mouth while simultaneously getting clocked by a regular. Oh and the shuffleboard table might just be the best in the city. Liquor and beer selection typical for a place like this.