Siena Elise Cristobal
Google
I came to the ER because I was 9 weeks pregnant, actively bleeding, and had just learned that my baby no longer had a heartbeat. I was already scheduled for a D&C on Monday, but because the bleeding started and the pain became intense, I rushed to the ER believing — as a first-time expectant mother experiencing my first miscarriage — that I could ask for an emergency D&C or at least guidance on what to do next. I also recently moved to the US, so I am still unfamiliar with the healthcare system and protocols, which added to my fear and confusion.
I also want to share that when I first spoke to Dr. Schlessinger, I was alone. My husband had been separated from me due to space limitations. I understand the ER can be crowded, but being in such a vulnerable position — frightened, grieving, and physically in pain — made it even more devastating to hear what came next without my husband’s support beside me.
Unfortunately, my interaction with Dr. Schlessinger was extremely disheartening. She was condescending and dismissive of my concerns. Instead of helping me understand my situation, she told me that my bleeding was “not an emergency” and that I “should not have come.” Hearing this while I was miscarrying my first pregnancy — alone, new to the country, and already terrified — made me feel completely invalidated. At a moment when I needed empathy and clarity, I received neither.
In complete contrast, the nursing staff were exceptional. When I cried and said “I don’t understand,” they took the time to explain everything with patience and compassion. They listened, comforted me, and helped me feel safe in a deeply confusing and painful moment. Their kindness made all the difference.
Dr. Schlessinger returned twice with a noticeably softer demeanor, but the emotional damage was already done. This experience has left me traumatized and shaken my trust in the U.S. healthcare system and this hospital. With or without knowing my personal background, she could have approached the situation with empathy and basic human care — especially during something as heartbreaking as a miscarriage and especially for someone still learning how the healthcare system here works.
I am incredibly grateful to the nursing team who supported me with understanding and compassion. I truly hope the hospital takes steps to ensure that no one else feels dismissed or belittled during such a vulnerable and life-changing moment.