Richard L.
Google
Slather yourself in some sunblock to get ready for this burning review. As all my fans know, I am a man of two things: analogies and cheap champagne. The only naturally occurring object I can think of to compare the service to is the anglerfish. Just like the tantalizing blue light it dangles in front of its prey at the depths of the ocean, the staff here successfully draws you in with the promise of good service. We arrived in the early afternoon to enjoy the Southern California weather by the pool, and were seated almost immediately. Sounds great, but this is when the chaos began.
While they placed us in the sun, we were told an umbrella would be brought over immediately to provide us with a well-needed respite from the 93-degree heat. To demonstrate my point, please refer to the photo of the patrons roasting in the sun. No, those aren't pieces of meat in the oven, though if you look carefully at the woman in the back right of the photo, you will see the true face of despair. This is what we were subjected to for 16 minutes before I finally got up and asked the waitress (who had not been by our table yet), if I could grab the umbrella myself. She apologized and said it would be brought right over, after which we waited another 10 minutes for an umbrella. After I stooped to the floor to pick up my burned skin that had sloughed off from my bone, I realized that we had been waiting 26 minutes without help from any servers. We were able to flag someone down at around 30 minutes, at which point I ordered a happy hour beer, and my assistant ordered a gin and tonic.
That's when we started the timer. It took the waiter 12 minutes and 48 seconds to bring us these two simple drinks (see photo). When he placed the gin and tonic down, we noticed gin all over his hand, and that the glass had spilled a significant amount of its contents on the way over. Furthermore, there were no limes or twists (see photo). This would have all been fine had this not been an $18 drink. On top of that, they charged me $8 for my beer even though it was supposed to be $5 during happy hour.
Oh and then the parking was $9 with validation. Look at how upset that made this one patron! No one should ever come here. Do not lot the anglerfish draw you in, as it will devour you with its predatory nature of overcharging you and providing you with horrible service.