Jenny L.
Yelp
I lie awake at night, and wonder what fresh hell tomorrow will bring, which is sad, so, I pretty much just do whatever Oprah tells me to.
If she says, "Go to Barton Springs Saloon!" Well, you know I'll be there, with a dollar Lone Star beer in my hand. I'll show up, sit on the patio, and rock my fanny pack.
The crowd is hit or miss, but pretty much every place I go to is like that. A dude will ask me if he can buy me a drink, and I'll be confused, because I have a drink, but I wonder if he will buy me some mozzarella sticks.
The patio is cool, covered, and there are lots of table and chairs for your butts. I read people aren't big fans of the crowd here, but after spending like six dollars on $1 Lone Stars, I don't give a crap.
Blerg.
The bathroom is the weird thing. When I pee, I realize I've spent way too much time in there, just reading all the pointless, shitty, lame, and gross graffiti. Drunk people are not as creative as I'd like them to be.
Hey nerds! If you're going to bring a Sharpie marker to a bar, at least write some witty or funny shit, so I have something worthwhile to read.
BS Saloon!!!! By the hammer of thor, I want to go to there!
Did I mention they have one dollar Lone Stars?
What the whaaaat!