Steve E.
Yelp
Two Californian investment bankers walk in to a Chipotle...
Investor 1: "Hey dude, I just had the most AMAZING weekend in Austin. We went to all the HOT SPOTS like SoCo and 6th Street--west AND east! Had dinner at the Oasis...amazing food. Bro, anyway, it got me thinking: We did well last year on the Peterson account, so what do you think about opening up a bar with me in Austin?"
Investor 2: "Heck yea, bro, as long as it's like Key Bar or J. Blacks, but a little more...you know...Austin-y! We should totally see a return on investment within a year--EASY!"
Investor 1: "EXCELLENT! Well, I've already done some research and I found this AMAZING spot, bro. It's an old gas station off W. Mary Street in this part of town called 75704. People are saying it's going to be like the new bar district in town, so we need to get on this thing pronto, mi amigo!!!"
Investor 2: "AWESOME! But one thing: Will we have live music there?"
Investor 1: "No, but here's what we will have: A) An INCREDIBLE sound system with lots of dance hits pumping overhead to keep people drinking and B) TONS OF FREAKING FLAT SCREENS, BRO! Also, I found this street artist who will do these edgy, Austin-y portraits of Stevie Ray Vaughan and Willie Nelson that we can hang on the walls. Locals love those dudes, and when they see that we've done, they'll know this place is STRAIGHT UP LEGIT!"
Investor 2: "BODACIOUS! But you know Austin is really big on craft beers now, so what about having a large selection of local beers on tap?"
Investor 1: "Too expensive. Everything will be bottled, and all brands owned by Budweiser InBev, to keep costs down. Of course, we'll have like 20 different ones to choose from."
Investor 2: "GNARLY! But what about parking? I want to be SEEN in the 75704, but don't really want to...you know...take the risk of parking next to some hipster's '93 Subaru and getting a door ding on my brand new Maseratti Quattroporte."
Investor 1: "Dude, already there. One word: Valet."
************************UPDATE*************************************
I received a note from the owner of the bar a few weeks ago and I will post it below:
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You even made me laugh...
1. Two of the owners are from AUSTIN born and raised.. the other one has lived within a mile of the bar for the last 13 years.
2. Two of us actually live blocks from the bar
3. We do have live music, just not ever night. The neighborhood association would not allow us to have outdoor live music at all.
4. The music is picked my the people in the bar.
5. People like a place to watch a game
6. We have been open for less than six weeks and after the city has cost us 100's of thousands in petty improvements so the Zilker Neighborhood Association would be happy (which they still are not), our beer selection will grow with time.
7. Bill, the local artist is a great friend and little more than a street artist...
8. We have limited parking and wanted to respect the neighborhood to keep the noise down late at night. SO YES... FREE...YES FREE Valet..
...FREE
Thanks for the completely off review...
-Corner Bar of Austin... Not affiliated with any other "Corner Bar" anywhere else.