Johnny N.
Yelp
It was 1:07 pm on the first Summer Saturday in New York City, the sun defrosting the city after a biblical winter. I put my Whole Foods tote bag down amidst a sea of women tanning at Pier 45, took off my black Banana Republic long sleeve t-shirt to use as my towel, and pulled out my book to signal to everyone that I'm simply nothing more than a bookworm. I felt like LeBron.
I had my wired apple headphones in with no music playing, as I'm first team all eavesdrop. I sat there, pulled my shorts up to make sure everyone could see my thigh tattoos, and began judging patrons for reading off of a kindle. Oh me? I'm just more of a physical book kind of guy.
I saw large groups of people playing cards, laughing, sipping wine, and having a genuinely good time. A rage began to fill within me. How do you even know 10 people that you would go to a park with on a nice summer day?
The rage morphed to jealousy, as I began dreaming of having enough friends to play Uno with. I ran through scenarios in my head, laughing at my imaginary friends as I put down an ice cold draw 4. "Wow Johnny! You might be the best Uno player alive. How did you get so good!?!"
Once this fantasy wore off, I began drumming up another one where a prime Eva Mendez was sitting next to me and said "Hi I'm so sorry to interrupt, but what book are you reading?"
I pretended to be caught off guard, paused my wired headphones, and responded "oh me? It's called 'Before the Coffee Gets Cold' by Toshikazu Kawaguchi... Yeah he's a Japanese author, I got it when I was in Kyoto... Oh you haven't been to Japan!?! That's crazy haha it's my favorite place in the world..."
But yeah, this is a nice place to chill and soak up some sun.
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