Justin P.
Yelp
So I flew to MN to help my friend unpack a storage shed full of his sh*t and drive it from Minneapolis back home to San Diego. During the trip we'd cross five states I'd never been to so to broaden my palette and expand my food horizons, I decided to turn it into my Culinary Tour of Middle America. Over the next few reviews I will discuss my greatest hits and worst misses, and hopefully paint of picture of what I experienced in the excursion. Follow along with me now, won't you?
First stop, en route to the house from Minneapolis/St Paul airport was The Bulldog, and my first impression was pleasantly surprising. Your typical hipster neighborhood hole, drinks were poured stiff, much like they are at Cherry Bomb, jukebox was good and punky, and call me shallow but the girls were far more attractive than I anticipated! After a couple of Jamesons I was introduced to Grain Belt beer, which is the local piss pilsner du jour. Think PBR but not as hip, way warmer and with far less bubbles. Does that paint the picture yet? It was fucking flat like a pint of kool-aid with no sugar and no kool-aid packet. Midwestern pisswater, but its tradition, they've been around for 150 years or something and it chased down shots like anything else, so what the hell.
Food was decent, I really wanted a good bratwurst while I was there, and my buddy pushed the cheese curds on me, which were awe-inspiring. Similar to mozzarella sticks, but smaller, with better texture and lighter than the bowling alley staples we've come to tolerate. The brat was OK, but I've made better at home, and had a more delish sausage in Chicago. Fuck it, I got what I came for, and I was ready to embark upon the Midwest.
All in all, good start for my first night in Minne, except for on the way to his parents' house, my boy getting pulled over and hauled off for a DUI, leaving me to get a ride to the 'burbs from the pigs. On the bright side, I knew nobody in the entire state, and got to stay in the lovely Executive Suites in Woodbury, MN. Regardless, my night was infinitely better than my friends.