Kevin B.
Yelp
Let me be clear: the problem here is me.
I don't know why, but I just can't seem to figure out how to order food at this establishment. I walk in with the same basic plan every time: I want a sausage (say, a bratwurst or a knockwurst), in a bun, with mustard and sauerkraut. Nothing wild. No sides. No aioli. No caramelized onions. Just a sausage. In a bun. Like a hotdog.
And somehow.
EVERY time.
I fail.
I use my words. I try to speak clearly. I even prepped for this latest visit by consulting AI. I studied. I practiced. I made sure I wasn't the problem.
But alas, I walked in and said:
"One bratwurst, one knockwurst."
The person behind the counter looked at me like I had just invented language.
"Brockwurst?"
No, not Brockwurst. I don't even know what that is. But I pressed on, "Never mind, just two knockwursts."
He asked if I meant the "San Francisco style." (A menu item with all kids of stuff including sides that I don't want)
I said, "Basically, yeah -- but without the sides or caramelized onions. Just mustard and kraut."
Foolish me.
What I received were two sliced sausages in trays, mustard and sauerkraut in little plastic ramekins, no buns, and one quizzical look when I asked, "Why is there no bun?"
"Like... a pretzel bun?" he asked.
Yes. Sure. That thing people put sausages on. A bun, man.
It was like I had asked for spaghetti.
I tried to make the most of it and ate some of the knockwurst (which was good) but I couldn't do it.
I just... left. Left the tray. Left the beer. (Keep the tip.)
Because clearly, I am not smart enough for this place.
If you're someone who thrives in an environment where menus are puzzles, and every order is a decoding game, this is your Disneyland.
If you're more like me, just hoping to wing it with words, stick to one of their 4 menu options. Or be prepared to draw picture of a hotdog.
I'll take my business somewhere less intellectually demanding.
Someplace where they'll meet me halfway to figure out this "knockwurst in a bun" business.