Jeanine D.
Yelp
Bruhhhh. Its a bakery in a Gas Station? I got so many questions.
So lemme set the scene for you:
I had an amazing 39-year-old Saturday -- nice walk at the ucla Botanical Gardens, took my dog to Rosie's Beach, saw an Indie film @ Laemelle with the homies, Ramen w/ my bestie after that.
then the sweet monster pulled up...
and if you read my reviews, you know her name is Sheila, she gotta attitude. And shes VERY demanding.
Shelia wanted something sweet & threatened me if I didn't take her to it.
And I'm too single and too out of shape to be fighting my inner demons on a Saturday night on a full stomach so...
I Googled "best cookies near me," and Zooies popped up 4 mins away.
Drove to the address and bruh
Why the fck am I at a gas station????
Clearly thought my GPS had me fcked up but...
But then I saw a giant sign that said "Zooies" inside what i have determined is the swankiest, most well lit (inside and out) gas station in LA.
Iont really understand how none ah dis works but that ain't none of my business...
The cookie selection at 11:30 PM? Pretty damn vast.
and it wasn't just cookies.
It's also bars & these sort of muffin top cookie things & coffee cake.
A few were gone, but plenty left.
As his customary for me in a new place, I asked the cashier -- who was hella cool (wish I got bros name for this) -- what his favorite was.
He said the Boston Cream Pie.
Now, lemme just state for the record...
Ya girl HATES marshmallows OUTSIDE OF A RICE CRISPY TREAT.
I don't want 'em in, on, or near me.
Buuuuttt.... exploratory missions aren't right unless they come with a recommendation from the person who knows better than you.
So i grabbed one.... uggghhhh
With mad fcking reluctance might I add.
also grabbed the walnut coffee cake and shortbread cookie cuz cant go wrong with shortbread....
(Famous last words.)
Now we gotta talk about the mf'ing playlist in the cookie shop.
Unreasonably good.
Im talking Lyfe Jennings, Keith Sweat, Monica -- the soundtrack for either romance or emotional collapse.
Cause remember, I just went through a break up so I am highly emotionally volatile and capable of busting into tears at a moments notice...
I digress
Funny thing i noticed: the gas station attendant was behind bulletproof glass.
The baker, however, with the cookies? Twas Not. LOL
If the place got robbed, guess the cookies go first.
A bold strategy. LOL
i digress yet again.
Anyway...
I ate the Boston Cream Pie in the car cuz #Greed.
Shockingly, it slapped.
The marshmallow ....worked.
unfortunately, it was cold as hell like it just came out the freezer and I wish it was warm or even room temp.
At home, I tried the shortbread cookie --SPIT IT OUT IMMEDIATELY
-twas was moist, firmishly soft...
Like cold mashed potato vibes.
Deeply unsettling.
The coffee cake?
My mom loved it.
I thought it tasted.... meh
Would I go back for the cookies? Nope.
One outta three aint good enough odds for me.
That's not even a C.
Buuuuttttt....
Would I go back for the ambiance,
the playlist, and ole buddy behind the counter?
Ummmhnmm, sho'll would