Jupiter Supper Club is a pretentious way to blow a lot of money - Review - Austin - The Infatuation
"If you’ve ever wondered what a $50 pizza looks like, scroll to the bottom of this review and prepare to be disappointed. Then keep that emotion bottled up, because it’ll steel you for the rest of your time at Jupiter Supper Club. The Downtown restaurant describes itself as “maximalist plant-based luxury,” which is another way to say that you’re about to pay a lot for vegetables. photo credit: Johnnie Losoya photo credit: Johnnie Losoya This place is less about what’s on the plate and more about what’s going on around you and who’s there doing it. The dimly lit space is divided into four dining areas, each with its own carefully curated vibe—one leans old Hollywood, another feels like a futuristic greenhouse, and somewhere in between, there’s a room that looks like the lobby of a hotel you can’t afford. Meanwhile, the waitstaff’s glances can feel just condescending enough to make you question whether your zipper has been down the whole time. This is the type of restaurant that wants to be mentioned in the same sentence as the Carbones of the world, with an air of exclusivity that warrants “eat clean and be seen” slogans printed across the menu. The food itself isn’t bad. Some of it’s actually pretty good. But no matter how well it’s prepared, there’s no circumstance where a single hen of the woods mushroom should cost more than a filet, or where an 8” pizza—topped with shaved black truffles that get lost in the shiitake cream and garlic sauce—should cost half a Benjamin. The best way to experience Jupiter? Book a seat in the private jazz room in the back. It’s intimate enough to feel like you’re getting something—anything—from the $30 cover charge. Skip the overpriced mushrooms and turnips, grab a cocktail, and pay for the live music instead. Better yet, head to Fabrik in East Austin for a truly great vegan fine-dining meal. Food Rundown photo credit: Johnnie Losoya Cocktails We wouldn’t visit for the cocktails alone, but they’re all solid and pair nicely with the food. photo credit: Johnnie Losoya Fried Giant Cauliflower This is less of a “giant” cauliflower and more like 10 fried florets on a plate. The creamy cashew ranch they’re served with is nice, though. photo credit: Johnnie Losoya Sunflower Sprout Salad We’re not sure if the sunflower sprouts are in the room with us, but they’re nowhere to be found on this plate. Kudos to the turmeric vinaigrette for being tasty. photo credit: Nicolai McCrary Grilled Carrots There probably shouldn’t be an “s” at the end of the dish, because we’re pretty sure this is a single carrot cut into bite-sized pieces. Despite that, they’re pretty tasty—they’re slow-roasted and have a good char around the edges. photo credit: Nicolai McCrary Black Truffle Pizza If you’re hoping for a traditional pizza replacement, look elsewhere. We prefer the vegan substitutes at the much more casual Possum Pizza. Paying $50 at Jupiter feels like turning over a “go directly to jail” card hidden on the menu. This pizza comes with shaved black truffles, but even a truffle-free version will set you back over $30. photo credit: Nicolai McCrary Hen Of The Woods Mushroom This mushroom is cooked well, and the tart green-apple pearls add a nice contrast to the more savory “meat” of it all. But it’s not worth the nearly $40 we paid." - Nicolai McCrary
