Chris L.
Yelp
Geek, nerd, dweeb, dork...ok, yeah you got me. Guilty as charged.
While these terms may have been mean spirited slurs during some of my more awkward teen years, they are now titles of honor that I pin fondly to the lab jacket of my persona. My name is Chris, I like science. I am a nerd. And you know what, I'm ok with it, because while the school yard tormentor is working at the local Quickie Mart to support his 6 brats and a toothless 300lb prostitute wife he met at a taping of the Jerry Springer show, this skinny legged geek got himself a fine ass hottie.
"It's poetry in motion and now she's making love to me. The spheres're in commotion. The elements in harmony. She blinded me with science. She blinded me with science! And hit me with technology." - Thomas Dolby
So when the TLB told me that OMSI, one of my favorite childhood haunts, was offering the opportunity at their monthly AfterDark event to wander the halls without the presence of shrieking children, with an adult beverage firmly in hand, it was something I couldn't turn down. And neither could a large portion of Portland's intelligent and cool populace. And while it was crowded, we still managed to create our own flying paper space ships, shoot balls across the padded room, make our hair stand up on end, and touch, push, pull and twist as many buttons, knobs, levers and handles we could get our hands on while occasionally learning a little more about the world we live in and what makes it tick.
"From my heart and from my hand, why don't people understand, my intentions...ooooh, Weird Science" - Oingo Boingo
Now I've never been confused with Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, but after agreeing to hold on to one electrode while submersing my hand into a bowl of water containing the other electrode, Beaker might be my more apropos Muppet doppelganger. As my body completed the electrical circuit and began to twitch, shake and shudder like an epileptic lap dog on crack , the TLB said it reminded her of the Simpsons episode where the family goes in for a little "aversion therapy" with Dr. Monroe. Wow, I didn't realize a shock therapy session was included in the $10 ticket price.
Since I prefunked with some good friends at Laurelwood beforehand, I used my advanced intelligence (finally) and passed on the samples of free vodka. I've learned through multiple self inflicted experiments that beer before liqueur...yeah it is scientifically true, really does make you sicker. The cash bars were a little overpriced, but that was to be expected. Plus, just having the opportunity to throw back a brew while pretending to be Mister Wizard was worth the $5 bottle of Mac's.
Overall, we had a great time and if you don't mind the crowds it is the best way to experience OMSI.
"I've got science for any occasion, postulating theorems formulating equations" - Beastie Boys