Dustin D.
Yelp
I had awoken from a drunken slumber with a belly full of Rye Lemondrops and Virgin Daiquiris. After just a wink of sleep, I had an intense and debilitating craving for an eggs benedict. I stumbled upon this spot from a sky mall magazine (I am an American Airlines Executive Platinum member) that I read on the flight into Bend.
I had intended to pass out pamphlets for tantric chakra hospice care, but my birkenstock strap busted in the parking lot as I walked towards Victorian Cafe from mustard yellow PT Cruiser (it's new). Let me tell you, those pamphlets were more scrambled than my eggs (i've already gone through menopause).
After approaching the establishment with a parking lot as congested as my deviated septum, I was greeted by a sweet lady who put me on the 2 hour waitlist to get in. Because of my height (I am 6'4, and have a fused L2 and L3) I was thankful for the freedom of open air. To my understanding, they do not have Lemondrops, so I was unfortunately dangerously dehydrated.
I am not fully literate so they offered to read the menu for me. It's a bit of a hefty menu, which I am extremely grateful for, but my helper got so tired after reading only half of the menu that he had to swap in someone else for the role while he recovered.
Let me tell you, the eggnog cheese curds are out of this world (it's a "secret" menu item, just ask your waiter for the Alamo special.) My eyes watered over the neighboring parties onion omelet.
As my lips blistered like a shishito pepper on a hot cast iron i quenched my thirst with a cock and bull ginger beer. For about a decade, i've been having intense and personal medical issues related to dehydration. My lips are chronically chapped, which is why I mentioned earlier about not having Lemondrops - no hate on the restaurant but I think it's important for others like me to be aware.
My food was fantastic. My eye patch (voluntary) eclipsed my vision a bit but I know even if i were able to see the full plate it would have been a vision to behold. For my fellow optical occlusion friends, it is very dimly lit. I needed to be very careful, especially considering my defunct birkenstocks.
I have a habit of taking souvenirs from any travels, and I knew this was going to be a place to remember. I snuck into the men's room after being disinterested in the women's offerings (the dire circumstances in men's bathrooms tends to remind me of my time in county). I spotted a painting above the urinal, but as I peeled the frame from the wall, I heard a knock. I was quick to throw the painting into my Eastpack before leaving. Normally, I would have replaced the missing wall art with something, but since my pamphlets had already scattered in the parking lot, I was unable.
Side note unrelated to the food, the bathroom is INCREDIBLY CLEAN. The can even tastes like Lysol!
overall all 7 out 38 stars.