Dylan K. Harriman
Google
If you’re looking for an average smash burger experience that will get you in the mood, try Wanna Smash in Van Nuys.
While looking for a spot to try on National Burger Day, Wanna Smash caught my eye for obvious reasons. A burger joint themed on sexual innuendos seemed promising, but it’s important to check if the food lives up to the branding. After all, it’s not about how big your burger is, it’s how it tastes.
Location: This place is tiny. While you’re not gonna have a ton of space as a business on Van Nuys Blvd, I’m not sure why they even offer indoor seating. There are 6 stools crammed into two bench style tables, and if you really did eat with 2 people next to you it wouldn’t be comfortable. There’s some outdoor seating but it’s the same kind of crammed stool/bench seating.
Food: I got The Cowgirl because I felt like I’d been doing all the work recently.
While I think it’s a crime to serve any burger (yes, even a smash burger) without lettuce or tomato already added (the menu offers a $1 up charge for greens and other items), The Cowgirl had quality smashed patties, perfectly crisped bacon, and huge onion rings. The home made BBQ sauce was delicious, but this thing was drenched in it. It could use less. The bun was soft and fluffy, and helped keep everything together. Solid presentation.
The fries were the best part of this meal. Way more than I thought I’d get, and perfectly seasoned (not buried in chili powder like a lot of these other places like to do.) The soda was standard, but surprisingly they didn’t have ice. I also wish they had a ketchup pump instead of packets, as the paper bag and tray doesn’t really give you space to make your own pile of ketchup.
Vibe: The branding is hilarious. Every menu item is well themed, and the ingredients somehow match the vibe. It’s insane that this menu includes items like “the happy ending” but also includes a “kids cheese burger.” I guess it makes sense, since for some reason I saw two toddlers eating at this joint. Doesn’t seem like the target audience, but I guess this place makes parents not only wanna have babies, but bring ‘em along.
The award for most insane menu item name goes to the Oreo flavored Milf-shake, aptly named “snowbunny.”
All in all, this place is worth it for the experience. If you live close I’d say you should grab the food for takeout, but you can probably make do with the limited indoor and outdoor seating if you come from afar. I’ll be back here to show friends, and try some of the other unhinged menu items.
Would lightly recommend.