Dans Le Noir is underwhelming whether the lights are on or off - Review - London - The Infatuation
"At Dans Le Noir, nobody can see a thing because that’s exactly what everyone paid for. The pitch-black European restaurant in Clerkenwell is a dining and social experience led by servers who are visually impaired. It’s a success in what it bills. It’s dark and you’re fed. But its failings aren’t in what you can’t perceive, it’s in what you can. After handing in your phone and getting a foreboding whiff of the signature Dans Le Noir perfume being shilled, you’ll enter a bar area that resembles a haunted airport lounge. Here, a mixture of Richard Curtis superfans, guffawing irony-seekers, and Groupon addicts gather to choose between the ‘SURPRISE’ or ‘VEGAN’ menu. Neither feels like the right option. From there, you’ll be led to the lights-out dining room and into a pleather chair. Everyone is a stranger, tinny R&B is playing, and your hand is guided towards the wine that’s been placed on the table. Like any wedding where you’re a plus one, it feels like a middle-class hostage situation. The mystery dishes placed in front of you? They’re fine. Texturally, everything tastes like it’s been pre-chewed and the panna cotta is so heavy on gelatine that it wobbles off your spoon into the abyss. Still, it delivers on the promise and you can’t see a thing. Whether this is a restaurant worth visiting, lights off or on, is another matter entirely. Food Rundown Surprise Set Menu A three-course surprise set menu will set you back just under £70 and all will be revealed after you’ve eaten it. We experienced a mushy fish with crisps on top. It was sea bass tartare that wasn’t bad, but could’ve done with much more dressing and seasoning. The main was a grizzled, stringy piece of meat (veal loin), apricots, and some random vegetables. It wasn’t great. The coconut panna cotta was elusive, but the bites we did have were marshmallow-ish, and not bad. Photo shows a diner's POV. photo credit: Jake Missing" - Jake Missing
