"The first time we came to Mamajuana Cafe, we saw people commemorating birthdays and graduations. But celebrating something here is as disappointing as a marriage proposal in the cutlery aisle of TJ Maxx. From the time-consuming tablet menu to the sparklers even the servers look bored by, almost everything at the massive Fishtown restaurant is mediocrity masquerading as extravagance. The chicken empanadas are dry, the flavorless paella is full of rubbery seafood, and the mystery ceviche looks like construction site materials on a plate. Skip the worst margarita and meal you’ve had in weeks, and head anywhere else instead (even TJ Maxx for a tin of popcorn)." - Candis R. McLean