"If you’ve never had tuna lasagna, here’s the full experience: It smells a little like cat food. Then you dive in, and it tastes similar to a tuna melt, but also how you imagine cat food might taste. Next, you wonder if maybe you should be eating more cat food. And before you know it, you’ve finished it all. Turns out, tuna lasagna is actually pretty good. “Seacuterie,” on the other hand, stays firmly in the cat food camp. Alaluna—a seafood-focused Italian restaurant hidden behind a West Village cafe and grocery store—has both, and that tells you all you need to know. photo credit: Patrick Dolande photo credit: Patrick Dolande photo credit: Patrick Dolande At this upscale spot with glossy wood floors and double-ply white tablecloths, you might try something you never knew you needed, or you might wind up picking at desiccated strips of salty fish jerky. Considering it’s easy to spend around $75 per person here, that’s a gamble you probably shouldn’t take. If you’ve already tried nearly all the Italian spots in the city, or if tuna lasagna sounds like something that would complete you, maybe check this place out (and avoid the seacuterie). If not, it’s an easy skip. There’s potential in the quirky, experimental food—like burrata with shrimp tartare—but some of it needs heavy workshopping. Food Rundown photo credit: Bryan Kim Burrata Shrimp tartare is a fun addition, but it gets lost in this dish. You mostly just taste the burrata and peaches, both of which are perfectly good. photo credit: Bryan Kim Bluefin Tuna Bolognese Lasagna This shouldn’t work, but it does, and it’s something you need to order. The bolognese tastes like the ocean, with creamy bechamel to smooth things out. photo credit: Bryan Kim Seacuterie Tuna bresaola! Swordfish bacon! Hiramasa prosciutto! All of it dry-aged and sliced into strips! Sound good? It isn’t. At least not $46 good. Maybe we’d take some of this dried fish on a hike and eat it if we got trapped under a boulder or something. But that’s being generous. photo credit: Bryan Kim Heirloom Chicken We remember so little about this chicken, and we take zero responsibility for this. It was a fine, but forgettable dish. photo credit: Bryan Kim NY Strip Kind of a shame to order beef at a seafood place, but the steak is actually one of the better options here. It has a thick, crunchy crust, and it’s served with supremely crispy potatoes." - Bryan Kim
