Brian R.
Yelp
**My 1900th review**
The food is spectacular. Arguably one of the top five eateries in the county, with far more authenticity than some of the stodgy Palm Beach eateries. What's not spectacular, especially on a weekend in "season," is an indoor dining room that resembles a sardine can, in terms of space usage.
Actually, it would be nicer to be packed in with sardines. Haven't met a living one, but, in all, I have to imagine they're pretty quiet, bone-in, and swimming.
Sadly, put 20-30 tax sheltering septuagenarian silver spooning seniors, from the boisterous bergs of the Northeast, into that tiny space, if you don't have hearing aid mute, and the volume can get pretty deafening.
Enough so that, while we enjoyed our corn and crab cake appetizer, at 6:15p., by 6:30p, with the restaurant filling in, our grilled double lamb chops, and chicken schnitzel, were affected by the chattering: who passed away; who wanted to avoid the Met in the current COVID crisis; Uncle George was a right old codger at the Vineyard last summer.
The din wasn't a win.
Neither was the old gal, who put at least half a gallon of some pricey perfume on her. As she squeezed into her table, going over the top of ours, the smell was strong enough that, for the rest of the meal, everyone and everything smelled like patchouli and camphor.
Chicken schnitzel Chanel was not what chef intended to serve. I stopped eating it.
By the time that we tried to eat the delicious coconut cake, to add to the noise, pretty much everyone can't see well enough that the phones come out.
A lovely elderly woman, a foot to my right, was using her phone flashlight to read the menu. Gabbing away, she carelessly turned it in such a way as to blast it in my eyes, long enough that I had to politely ask her to either turn it off, or read me my rights.
Food portions are built around old school abbondanza supersize. I wish they'd follow Cafe Boulud's lead, locally, and focus more on quality, with a lot less quantity. Virtually no one here, nor their realtors, fashion designers, or auto detailers, faces the famine that provoked this kind of excess,
That being said, plating was excellent.
They have a small bar. Big wine list. Given the big ticket wine bottles, and their very 101 list of spirits, they lean into the wine side a bunch more.
Parking is complimentary valet in the tiny strip mall, that they inhabit.
Y'all, ambiance is a thing. Table packing impacts your food. Maison Carlos is peaceful. Gratto is brutal. You're sized like Carlos, with the bustle of a restaurant twice your size. You want prime dollar for exceptional cuisine?
Fix this, or run over to Airbus Helicopters, and buy each table some helicopter headsets. That way, we can at least enjoy our guests company, without the cacophony.