Meadow Lane Is Ready to Open. TikTok Won’t Believe It.

"I encountered a high‑concept gourmet grocer in Tribeca that, on paper, has everything neighbors might desire: dog treats made from dehydrated bone broth; hanger‑steak breakfast burritos on Caramelo tortillas; a smoothie bar with a pre‑patinaed bronze menu; pacifying light‑wood interiors with chocolate‑brown tile and a room devoted to artful floral arrangements; chicken tenders breaded with gluten‑free panko and fried without seed oil; hormone‑free caviar; kale chips flavored with yuzu and nutritional yeast; custom Caffè Panna flavors; and even grapes from Japan. Despite a completed June build‑out and design work by Sarah Carpenter’s studio (including water‑resistant wood paneling and decorative Cheerios artwork), I can’t buy any of it yet — the project has been delayed more than 430 days by permitting snafus, and the founder, Sammy Nussdorf, has documented nearly 700 TikTok posts as @brokebackcontessa while amassing over 126,000 followers; he says he’s passed Con Ed inspection, got the gas turned on, and is mere weeks from opening. I noticed he hired an executive chef and culinary director who developed prepared foods such as a “Gravalox Sando” on pumpernickel with tarragony herby cream cheese and sprout salad, a crab salad with Aleppo pepper, lime zest, and yuzu kosho, a sandwich called “the French” with jambon de Bayonne, Dijonnaise, brown butter, Comté, and cornichons, and a parsley‑heavy house green juice — and he’s tried to keep some prepared items affordable (a handful priced below $15). Given the glossy staging, influencer attention (including sending Bethenny Frankel a sample) and a social‑media performance that includes cheeky references to Anna Delvey and the catchphrase revision to “I am allegedly opening the gourmet grocer in Tribeca,” I observed that some followers call it performance art while others eagerly await real doors and real grocery bags." - Ella Quittner